For ages 25 and up. If your brain is still developing read at own risk.
First time I dreamt of Yukari was on my 21st birthday, though I don't remember what it was. That day I also saw Pram the Oracle who verbally abused me, and also dreamt I walked around a paddock with a girl, a couple of times pushing her down onto a venomous spider that was Izanami Hades, which made her cry and tell me to stop. Second time I saw Yukari, I remember only seeing her smile at me. Third time I saw Yukari, I was following her around an auditorium, acting like a familiar, hugging onto her from behind to lend strength while she was used gap magic to hack the matrix or something at several points around the hall.
I was on a 1-4 podium at a school oval, there was a decent crowd of people before us. I'm on the #1 spot with a spirit of Flandre Scarlet beside me, 2-4 are taken up by one guy and his doubles with Sakuya Izayoi spirits beside them. He's annoyed at me and wants me to give up #1 but I ignore him. A bell sounds as the crowd runs off towards the school. I say "I've got this..." as I step off the podium in the same direction but after a few steps start staggering around like a drunk, saying "shit what the fuck am I doing I want to kill and eat so badly". Heading towards the school I find a box full of samples of preserved human heads and shoulders. I grab 3 or 4, leaving a couple behind, and munch on their brains, feeling like I'm absorbing their memories. I thought this whole thing seemed like a bad idea, a human nearby echoed my thought "is it really a good idea to turn people into youkai and give them human samples?'
Undongein and Kyo(Dir en grey) fought at a gas station with Farron Greatswords, Udon lunges at him, stabs the dagger down while cleaving him, spinning around she cleaves him twice more while he's still staggered. He's barely alive, runs up a nearby kid's slide, she chases him down and beheads him. Kyo's head shudders with a look of horror which makes her say "oh please, after all the hundreds of people you've beheaded". As he dies another dead head appears beside him with tattoos and such, his astral self perhaps.
Saw Dir en grey performing Touhou arrange songs live, I think the song was Necro Fantasy, there were pictures of Ran on the drumset.
In a pocket dimension or otherworld, I see on the horizon of the sea Aku as a three headed three tailed dragon. Exiting the world I'm then at a table with Flan and Remilia, they're offering stuff like kisses and hugs for money but I'm broke so they refuse me.
In a hostess-like place, Flan and Remilia offering services but I'm broke. They lead me up into a halloween themed lovely room where there's a little framed white text on black background saying "Void is Infinity, just Empty". Back downstairs Flan comes up to me crying asking for a hug because a fat guy kissed her. I refused since they weren't giving me anything, Remilia then says "come on, he was really ugly." so I did it. Playing VR Touhou Dark Souls with ZUN and another guy as my white phantoms. In a second floor room in the hostess place fighting Flan, Remilia and Sakuya, whoever was slain last becomes the boss, we left Flan. Then we're outside the SDM though it was a castle that was high up beyond many stairs. Flan slowly strutted down them as me and ZUN knocked back some beer. When she finally reaches the bottom the fight starts. She comes up to me and does a twirl with a little blood scythe that insta-kills me, so ZUN just lets her kill him, and so does the other guy. Taking off our VR sets, the other guy vomits, I make a wry remark, he gives an unamused response.
Remilia was gifted teeth by Satan, so sharp her whole mouth was inflamed and she was always irritated, but she was proud of them. Later I'm on a boat with three thrones, the middle was reserved for ZUN, the left one had Remi on it and I sat with her, the right was empty. ZUN comes to his throne and says to me "a certain plumber(Mario) is going to need his brother to save him." Later I'm with Remi, I go off to find a present for her at a market place. I ask what vampires like and I'm told Tarantula Bars are their favourite, so I bring back several of them. She gets excited, wolves them down and belches loudly, one of the nearby girls says "yeah lets all just pretend that was elegant". There was a Catarina knight that got killed and shat on by someone, he was furious and chased after that person, but his superior in Gundyr's armour told him off and said to let it go.
I possessed a white ZUN sword, I went through a Bloodborne forest looking for a Silverbeast to slay but fell into a crevasse.
I possessed a Touhou sword that became more powerful along with the glory of the Touhou series.
Came across ZUN walking home with a few others scattered along a road. I drive by on a motorcycle blasting ACDC and wheelie past him then speed off on a side-road, then thought about drawing hiragana with wheelies.
With Yukari, Youmu, Reimu and perhaps a couple of others. A technological tower like Gintama's Terminal rose out of the ground, many cannons came out of its sides shooting master sparks downward, blasting the earth apart into floating debris. We were scattered but Yukari pulled us through the air and gathered us before Berserk's dwarf blacksmith. He told Youmu he'd make something for her, she said "anything with a blade!" He crafted a Bio-blade Axe(looked like Dragonslayer's Axe but with green poison constantly dripping off it, it had Bloodborne stats, 120 regular and 80 poison(not status effect but a damage type). After handing it to her she immediately flew into a flurry at Yukari who rapidly dodged around without moving from the spot. We were preparing for something, going to the moon? Reimu was making a lucky Tewi charm, Yukari looked worried which I thought was cute so I hugged her. It turned into a manga where me and the Touhous joined hands in a chain rising out of the left page while desperately reaching out to the ZUN coming out of the right page.
Yuuka fused with Kokoro and maybe Udon or Youmu to become unbeatable, since she had 50 lives because of the masks.
In my backyard was gardening equipment. I saw over the fence Yuuka who was my gardener. She looked at me and said "you look like you could use a vacation or three."
On a bunch of floating islands, I fell from them into the sea and Jörmungandr rose up trying to eat me, saying if we fuse we'll become unstoppable. I flew away while throwing black fire orbs at it. At a school, throwing around some more black fire orbs at people. I come to a classroom where Yuuka was, but since she was surrounded by a large crowd I wasn't interested. I float between walls into another class next door where Seiga was alone, a lone kid was about to enter so I wanted to stop him from being so lucky. I sealed the door, the kid tried the handle but couldn't get in. Seiga went over, I followed her whispering in her ear "using the hairpick is cheating" but she used it anyway and gave the kid a kiss through the hole in the door. I said he was the luckiest person in the world at that moment and slowly floated back to Yuuka's classroom in defeat.
In a classroom with other people, I had lost to Seiga in a challenge again, for a punishment game she said "make the straining face you make when using the toilet."
At an assembly where test results were being handed out. I was sitting next to Youmu when the teacher comes to me, puts a test on my desk with Youmu's name on it asking if its my idea of a prank. I check it and the answers were irrelevant to the questions, she wrote 6 4 9 saying it had cosmic significance and other random stuff. The teacher had high expectations for Youmu so after she finds out its really hers she slumps her shoulders and walks dejectedly back to the podium while the Dark Souls YOU DIED sound effect plays. Later I enter 6 4 9 into an alien meteorite which made it open, it had some scientific papers in it I think. Later in a classroom Youmu hands me a note with 7 on it and a death curse saying to say "have a good one" or something while leaving a room. When I left the room the teacher says it to me, so I came back in and said it back to him and called him an idiot.
An event at a school hall that was being streamed on Youtube, I thought about how it was rare to have something so interesting happen on youtube. Laomoto Khan, who was maybe Cthulu, was the organiser. Various shows were organised, I remember me playing danmaku against Yukari, dodging her non-spell where she forces you up against the wall while she was facing away with her ass showing through her dress. Eternity, Cirno and Lily were representing the seasons, Autumn being missing was probably inspired by the doujin "Seasons Lit with Gold"
In a room with people I have dreamt many dreams about being stuck around, Yukari came and said to me "can't escape this room until you realise the truth."
Hounded by a dark cloud in a dream that told me I would be enslaved to those people for all eternity, I said it was wrong and that my goddesses would save me, I rattled off their names but only Hecatia's name did anything,. I sang Hecatia~ Hecatia~ while spinning around and was transported from the room to beautiful vistas of sunsets over lakes and forests.
Playing a Touhou game, between each chapter you could select between 8 different modes in a little selection wheel, power, speed, life-pickups, etc. I thought it was lame Marisa needed power to use Master Spark and shot an Alice SA-tier laser otherwise. One of the characters was a Mensis scholar, his non-power bomb was "Living String" which sent a string to spasm over enemies, his power bomb was "Lie to the Brain of Mensis, and you'll end up in the Bath" it summoned a messenger bath taking up most of the top half of the screen, the Mensis brain hung over it while 4 or so living strings flew from the sides of the bath to spasm over foes.
I left Gensokyo, zoomed out I could see it was a great plateau ringed with forest, I descended from a natural ramp and then doubled back towards to base of the plateau and entered a cave. Within a large dark room were three guardians, to the left was an Amygdala clinging to a column, in the middle was a (youkai?)roadroller, and to the right was an agile humanoid. When I got past them I entered a place called Dimmlr. There was no light and everything was visible as visual snow in darkness. It was a youkai pandemonium where humans were hunted, tormented, killed, eaten and respawned endlessly.
Wandering around Cathedral Ward. There was a great hole and I jumped down it and fell perhaps over a hundred feet before landing, the place name Dimmlr appeared on screen. The hole continued some more so I jumped down again and fell perhaps another hundred feet before landing, the place name Abyss appearing on screen.
Picked up a red dial-phone and was cursing some people to Dimmlr/Hell, when I left the phone Yukari came to me and said "Dimmlr is a very strange place."
I wished for dreams about the SDM before going to bed, and then dreamt about lying on the floor of the foyer of a dark, locked, empty mansion. I counted the years I spent there, and lost count at 2 billion, though kept a vague count up to 12 billion. The darkness eventually became somewhat comfortable. I ran out of bed upon waking, afraid of "building another mansion" in my half-asleep thoughts, and paced around outside until I stopped feeling terrible.
A young lad fell deeply in love with Remilia and even got married to her. Then she locked him away in a mansion to pine after her for all eternity.
Playing as Flandre, using a pyromancy called Searing Flame, like one of Keeper of the Old Lord's fire sweeps but thicker, heavier, and lingered in the air for a few seconds, inflicting frenzy build-up, scarlet coloured.
Slaying a colossal mecha hanging upside-down in space with Flan by using flames projected from a sword at the end of a staff, recreating the end of an anime somehow by having bloodstains spread over certain parts of its body.
Running along a boardwalk over a lake and I had this feeling I had to do something or I'd be missing an event of earth-shattering importance. I see a guy sitting at the end of a branch of the boardwalk at a wooden picnic table and know I gotta make it to him in time, but I'm not fast enough so I do a certain thing I do in dreams to go faster: get on all fours and push myself along backwards. I make it to this guy and rear up belting the last couple stanzas of Alstroemeria's Scolded by the Princess at him in a terrible, breaking voice, making him cringe hard but I pay no mind as I grab the picnic table he's on and shake him violently over the water's edge.
Singing Thank you for.(ALR remix) on a sidewalk, some old ladies pass me. They seem creeped out by me so I followed them while singing, so they start running, so I start backwards running after them whilst still belting the lyrics, and I hear a voice saying something like "3 ryo, 4 mon" which I took as outstanding praise from Yukari, and had memories in the dream of her occasionally giving monetary ratings to Rinnosuke in ColA.
I was told Yukari represents America, saw her wearing an American flag bikini.
Watching the Pentagon from a hill with another dude. We see Yukari leave the Pentagon from a door, look around right and left for people, and seeing nobody, she flipped over onto all fours and scuttled off like an insect. The dude next to me joked "haha your crazy scheming world leader reptilian girlfriend sure is something huh" but I was staring, frozen from the insane insect-in-human-skin movements, and looking at me he started being creeped out too.
At a backyard with other people including one annoying faggot that was practicing Japanese. I had a fumo as did some others, it went strangely limper than usual and I remembered something about the fumos going to die of SIDS at a certain time so I said "my fumo is fucking dead!" The annoying faggot also had a Yukari fumo so I planned to steal it from him, I did so then put up with a long annoying looney toons chase where I couldn't seem to shake him off. I got helped by Shō Fu Kan whose attacks actually seemed to do something, so I lost the guy for a bit. I wanted Shō to escort me home but it seems he couldn't be bothered so he parts ways with an "Aba". The guy comes back but he ends up strung up on a fence and seems to finally be done for. Also stuck on this fence was Kaguya who had an amazing expression of extremely weary indifference. I climbed up and high-fived her, then foot-fived her, then left with a group of people. We came across a view of a beautiful valley, I said "now this is what I call a valley". We walked down it towards the sea, the grass became wet and muddy so I said "it'd be a shame if a kraken ate us all while we're bunched up like this", the murder theme from Psycho played as a giant purple toothy cephalopod maw consumed everyone but me, I jumped out and landed nearby thinking to teleport away but consumed by another one of them and woke up thinking at best I'd teleport home while still inside the thing.
A girl had a small Doremy sweet-sleep matress with vibration function but didn't like it for some reason, so I took it off her hands. I interacted with Doremy through a strange full body View Master thing, she gave me a hand job. When I left the View Master I was in a car, I had a key ring that was a Unhumanitarian award congratulating me for getting hundreds of thousands of people killed by collapsing a reservoir. At a hotel arcade, I won a jackpot so I was being given a nice room with nice dinner and Doremy was by the bedside. Saw Doremy, except she was weird short trunks for tits.
With a couple of people I hate, they were bugging me but I ignored them quite well. I walked off but they chased me, I ran and the path ahead was an obstacle course. I climbed up wooden beams and saw no continuation so I thought I need to take a leap of faith, but then saw I could climb down and the path continued on. After a while of chasing I woke up in an office with Hecatia, she was holding a clipboard and marking me. She said my sense of direction was improved, she poked my forehead and said it's good my mental tentacles are working. I asked "mental tentacles?" but she was apparently so busy she got angry I even asked, she told me to take my gift by the door and leave, but one of the people who chased me entered and broke it, Heca shrugged "eh, doesn't matter."
I was with one of those people again on platform in space, there were big TV screens with popular entertainment broadcasting and I was so unamused by it I stepped off the platform and fell into space. I chanted "Hecatia" and was sucked into a golden vortex tunnel which I flew through for a while as dark shadows chased me. I was spat out on some concrete hanging off the side of a great church that was floating in space, a note flew to me and read "fuck me, if you want to do her then save me". I climbed a concrete face, found the entrance and entered the church which was filled with rich treasures, paintings, sexy venus statues and such, including one statue of a spider queen. Suddenly I was at the front of an assembly of a cult of nuns who were performing a ceremony, three golden crosses descended from above with golden light and three nuns became pregnant. I found this abhorrent, left the hall and managed to trip over some priceless artifacts and break them, then thought fuck it and went around smashing everything. The nuns must have heard because they came after me and eyed me suspiciously, I bluffed and said I had a panic attack, they still seemed suspicious and one of them stepped forward and asked me to hold her in my big sailor arms, which made me shiver with lust. My lustful reaction had them unimpressed, one of them said something like "after all, he's uncool" and I was aware of space nun battleships outside the church aiming their dots on me(I presume their weapons wouldn't cause structural damage) but before they fired the Star Fox crew appeared and started blowing up their ships with really beautiful violet explosion special effects, I thought I was watching a movie as I remembered "how beautiful the special effects were".
I managed to make my way to and confront the male cult master of the space nuns, he cast the same seal he had cast upon Hecate upon me, which divided the mind into the phases of the moon. Though he successfully did this, somehow this meant I won. It skipped to credits(back to being a movie again) and the credits were rather spoiled by advertisements for ugly ass western cartoons.
in the middle of an award ceremony hosted by Hecatia. I was awarded the title of Hecate's #1 Witch and had a little flag divided into four squares, green and silver. I questioned why #1 would be silver instead of gold but then realised it's because "silver is better than gold." There were awards handed out to other peoples, at one point the spider queen that statue was based off of came out, she was tall and somewhat monstrous but had an exotic charm, she said something about "love" but said it in a thick French accent, as a joke of sorts, then left. I saw Hades Izanami was present but was sitting in a dazed stupor, I went and prostrated myself beside her. During the ceremony I was being an annoying ass so Hecatia, being easily pissed off, arranged a punishment for me later. At some point I was outside Hecatia's mansion, there were three children who had been transformed into little bugs and had been swallowed by another bug, I freed two of them but the last I squeezed out too late and he was dead. The other two children, transformed back, said something like "It's ok, he's in a better place now, right?" I said "nah, chances are he's reincarnated into a life even shittier than the one he just had." the kids replied "but that sounds shit!" to which I said "of course it's shit! The Universe exists for our suffering!" I went back to the mansion, I knew that I wasn't supposed to explore the upper floors but did so anyway, a collar appeared on my neck and I was yanked by a chain to the top floor at the foot of a throne, with Morion's blades stuck in both my hands
In Hecatia's mansion, on one of the lower floors stuck around an annoying idiot, he was gloating a whole bunch about some videogame clips of himself. I was annoyed and bored out of my mind so I took a hard foam replica of Profaned Greatsword I had and whopped him in the neck so hard it broke and his head dangled around like a Jack-in-the-box. I left to the floor above, found Yuyuko with a bunch of cats and played with them for a bit. She asked me for a secret passageway so she can sneak in and play sometime. I just happened to have been told one by Hecatia, if you did something by some blinds this cosmic star-filled secret passage was revealed. A whole class of children were watching and were chattering about what I just revealed and Yuyuko said "isn't this bad?" I said it's ok and told one of those children to forget and this command spread amongst them and suddenly they were all left wondering what they were just talking about. That annoying faggot from earlier, still with his head dangling around, run up the stairs shouting about how he's a retarded self-fellating piece of shit, somehow I knew Yuyuko had hypnotised him into admitting this and I laughed my ass off so hard I woke up laughing my ass off. I talked about the definition of a "bucking bronco" with others, and at some point I was made to ride a bucking bull around a colosseum along with others who were punished by Hecatia.
On a flat meteorite apple farm in space with Hecatia sorting different apples, tossing away the ones that weren't very good. I'm with Akyuu, she had red eyes and stares up at the stars with absolute hatred for some cosmic bastard individual. She had brought death to several stars that had turned into bleeding eclipses(like the eclipse in DS3's Kiln) in her hatred for him. She and I were to walk the "Path to a Good Destiny", we lined up at the sides of two rows of stars that stretched on like a road, Hecatia appeared between us and Dark Souls prompt appeared "x to Walk the Path to Good Destiny", once initiated a profiling of many different images of us in many different places flashed, the Way was "visualise thoughtlessly every day for 10/100/1000 days" At the end of the profiling the King of Fighters, a biege coloured male Okina, was summoned to pass judgement upon the bastard, as first he acted in deference to him but soon started to show his hate.
Akyuu had unleashed an apocalypse of worms upon mankind, out of apathy it seemed. I was one of her generals and was infested by an especially large worm. Things were underway when Akyuu disappeared, we searched her room only to find light blue crayon scribbles on the wall, it seemed Cirno had made friends with Akyuu and she no longer had to will to go through with it all.
I had been hired to kill a couple of "liquid humans". I walked down a very long corridor until I came upon an old couple sitting in sofas. They attacked me with sharp liquid spurts of themselves from their fingers, instead of making me bleed it made me shrink, I was chunked down to the size of a small child before bailing out a window. The female of the couple came after me, I ran while yelling "help, this old woman's chasing me!" A little girl nearby who knew the old lady as a teacher and really hated her said "you chose the worst person to say that to." She got on a little tricycle and shot at the lady with a nerf gun, chasing her down a road into a city while chanting the lyrics to Necrofantasia ALR Rewind. I thought "what a fucking hero" and "so this is where the sample comes from." I returned from my failed mission to Devil Corp, there was a poem by Orin carved into the floor of the large lobby room, had English and Japanese and swear words but I've forgot it. There were lots of Aldrich Faithful and other phantoms running around the lobby. At some point I was on another floor where there was a bar room, a bartender devil, a devil band and the whole floor was a giant sigil. I walked around trying to see if I could walk around the entire sigil without ever retracing steps, but I was having trouble. The Devil appears so I ask him how to do it, he leads me around in a dance, at one point smiling which I immediately can't help but reflect, he leads me to the centre then vanishes, along with the other devils. I went to my office, I was adjusting an Akyuu wallscroll while being watched by her, she frowns as I accidently crease it. An announcement says Devil Corp is shutting down so we start clearing our things. We go downstairs and pass by Toyosatomimi no Miko, dressed in white with the inside of her cape red, I laugh "ha! Miko works for The Devil too?" Akyuu says even though it's called Devil Corp she never saw anything evil going on. She checked her box of things and was missing a pendant, looking around for it it turned out to be the plot of a kid who lured us around for a while before coming with it and challenging Akyuu to a duel in a mobage. She immediately accepts, her username being "theyshouldcallmeHARDNEET", she had far exceeded the kid's level of pay2win and grind in the game, thrashed him and took back her pendant.
At a special moon viewing party, the moon was indeed much larger than usual, up to 3 times bigger. I wasn't that impressed though, yet when it dipped below the horizon it then rose back up 10 times bigger than before, then all of humanity was being rounded up because the Lunarians had come and taken control. I passed by Yuuka, separated by a fence, she kept a distance while I reluctantly went with the rest.
A terrible event occurred, in a lounge room, through interaction with what I vaguely recall as a cube. Strange humanoids with strange eyes appeared and were perhaps infectious. I went outside avoiding them and saw Yuuka, I asked her if everything was going to be ok, she said "yeah" but seemed shaken up. A malicious AI was developed in Japan, I think it was called OBI, one of the people on the development team was a fat ugly bastard who fed it the most toxic dialogue he could think up. He was only there because the female organiser had a crush on him. This was dreamt several years after the prior dream, and I knew that OBI was responsible for the cube and that it produced a Borg-like human complex. I was talking with the lead Rance creators atop some marble pillars, I forgot what was said. I left them and flew uphill for a long time before seeing something related to "The Cube". I saw a vision where I descended through darkness surrounded by black silicon with silver circuits. I was back to the hill I had flown to, I flew around a ruined city where flocks of humanity turned into zombies all plodded on towards a singular destination.
I was sent to Oedon's Chapel to prevent Hecatia from performing a Human Instrumentality. I arrived a few minutes before the ritual time, saw a ritual material left on an altar that looked like asparagus. I grabbed it and chucked it out a window. A few minutes later Hecatia arrived, saw me and the missing ritual material, said "oh", then left. Outside, near a lake, Wagisagi swam and flew around in a dance. I was with some Touhou characters I can't remember, it was the night of two moons, they were wondering why there was four moons in the sky, one was the water's reflection, one was a comet that was the predicted second moon, the others wondered about the last extra moon, I said it was probably Yukari fucking with us, then gaps appeared around it and she popped out nearby to mess with the others.
Joon was working as a maid at the SDM, the residents playfully left a room she just cleaned as a sty, covered with shit piss and vomit. When she saw it her expression contorted with a mix of disgust, shock and rage, an eye brow twitching. The others who were watching loved her reaction since it was the exact way Sakuya had reacted. Remilia left Joon a little note which said in red "you're mine"
Sakuya had started getting sloppy and had been making so many careless mistakes that she was actually fired. A famous butler/chef guy had been hired as her replacement. I saw Sakuya walk out with her box of things. Then, in an crummy apartment in the outside world, Sakuya woke up, went over to some clothes and started folding them with shaking hands.
At a party sitting next to Youmu, I saw Remilia and got an autograph from her that read "chi -s" in red. Sakuya passes by and I ask her for a slice of cake, she gives a terse response in a cool low voice and heads off to fetch some. I realise I'm in a dream and ask Youmu to hold hands thinking it might help me stay asleep. Sakuya comes back with a covered platter to see me holding hands with her and starts walking off. I go after her asking about the cake and she says it's gone, I lift platter's cover and it was indeed gone.
With Remilia who had dumped her lovely clothes from this picture into the dirt and was threatening to kill herself because I spent all my time playing Dark Souls 3. I said if she wanted me to stop she had to marry me but then I would spend all my time fucking her until she's pregnant instead, she said that's ok
I had been sleeping with my Simon's Necronomicon, there was a chat of its practicioners watching me in my dreams. I sliced up my father with a tiny sickle, I figure a Needle of Eternal Agony, a metaphor for me leeching small amounts of cash off him I suppose. I went and sat at the right seat of a red twin throne with Remilia. One of the people in the chatroom said he abhorred me while another said he sympathises with me after finding out the profane nature of the gods through reading Lovecraft. The people in the chat were talking about Japanese gods. I saw Ninigi in Gensokyo, he looked like ke-ta's Kaguya, but male, just wearing an unbuttoned shirt, standing outside a small red painted wooden shrine among greenery. It was where he had retired. He was annoyed at the people in the Necronomicon chat, calling them "Ravens raving about our mythology."
With Shinki at a dinner table, I handed her my headphones which had EDGE playing and she listened for a bit.
Saw Shinki at an airport and waved at her, she waved back with a smile. I went through many hallways with a group of Touhou characters though I remember only Kaguya. We come to a classroom with vibrant colours scattered all over the walls and uncanny but beautiful Venus statues all around. I used a saw to slowly bisect a statue a couple of ways but it retained its shape, Kaguya was pestering me to give her the saw and she quickly bisected it repeatedly until it disintegrated into rubble. A sample was analyzed and it had traces of male desire, as if men had been absorbed into the statues, and some minerals I don't recall. A video tape was brought out and a mad man had an unconscious girl and a vibrant coloured squirming tentacle thing. He fed it into her navel and she had a horrifying seizure of shapeshifts into bizarre colourful half-tentacle person forms until settling into some odd shape. He kept adding more tentacles until it formed into a statue I suppose. Some of the tape-watchers vomited.
Met Makai residents at a bar. I tried getting Shinki's attention until she picked me up like a kid and raised me up high for a second before letting me down. She and Yumeko started up Mystic Square with one of them doing up and down and the other left and right while I took control of bombing.
Me, Shinki and a couple of fairies fused into the Ultimate Fairy.
At a big waterslide in space. I met Shinki before going on it and she had 6 horns on her head kind of like Aku's but also shaped like her demon wings. Went on the slide and near the end of the course I noticed that, Kagura(from Gintama)'s towel was coming off, and then it did, before, zoomed far away, everything in space shook with a scream. Then a transparent image of Yukari appeared behind the solar system's planets, rewinded their movements, then I was back to poking at Shinki's horns.
A giant Yukari was lording over a metropolis from above the clouds. She was completely oblivious as a far more giant Eirin poured out a beaker of acid onto her. Yukari started to fade through the rainbow's colours from violet to vermilion before turning into Reimu then vanishing. Eirin was then kicked off into space by a far more giant Hecatia.
2021 Valentine's Day I dreamt me and Yukari agreed on my name, 八雲 永霊念 (Yakumo Eilienen)
Get in a car with Yukari in the passenger, another guy tried to get in same seat as her so I told him "get the fuck in the back seat you fucking piece of shit". He did so while she smirked with a "heh". I was walking with her and with a bunch of boring idiots, I suddenly realised it, told her "hey lets go home" then so we did and she gave me a lap pillow + mimikaki.
Yukari and I were chasing a host in Irithyll, we had killed his white phantoms, he resummoned them, so we rekilled them and were chasing him down again. I was chanting a sing-song taunt based on his name before I finally seized him in my arms. I wondered what I should do when Yukari came up beside him, reached her hand under his shirt and pulled his heart out in front of his face. I laughed and said "my wife is a cruel predator."
Yukari was giving some words of praise to one follower, and to another she gave a kiss in the air beside his ear. As she was walking off with me afterwards I was very annoyed. I asked "where's my kiss?" then she gave me a kiss in the air beside my ear
I was a cop, I cold-bloodedly shot a lawbreaker dead. After I got off I went into totally-not-Paddy's Pub with a Devil/Trump worshipper, a tranny and a lovecraftian artist. The tranny was calling me beautiful and coming onto me until I made it clear I had no interest, then he just said "oh, well, you look kinda gay anyway." The devil/trump worshipper was antsy with me so I said "hey! I like the devil, and I like trump" giving a thumbs up for each, which placated him. The artist was drawing a giant sketchy gap heart, I mentioned to him that I was retardedly jealous over Yukari and he just gave me a laugh. He said he had a dream where a guy he knew had a fridge filled with bags of organs and flesh that were Yukari's. He showed me his pictures of "quality cthulu monsters", I said "yeah I want to draw some quality cthulu monsters", he asked "why don't you?" I only shrugged.
I was wandering around a shopping centre looking for some special honey. Every 10 minutes or so Mergo would cry and everyone's heads turned into giant eyeballs along with general Nightmare vision for a minute. On one of these cries I distracted myself by focusing on sinking balls at a billiard's table like the third door protagonist from Fata Morgana. There were some Touhou cosplayers by a fountain. Eventually the shop closed before I found any honey, I drove away in a Scooby Doo Mystery Van albeit so terribly I ran over a bunch of people. I ditched the van and was acting natural when I came across Morgan Freeman. He wanted to motivate me and he had three things to tell me. I only remember that one of them was that he found Always Sunny very funny and found it a guilty pleasure because he thought that people would think that he wouldn't enjoy that kind of humor.
I was calling myself Belial, Pride, Success, The One, The Emperor. Then I started swearing and cursing in such a negative way that my grandma who was out of earshot in another room started coughing sickly, and my mother who could hear me called me foul.
I was before a great golden door that led into some place that required holy protection, I looked back and saw Jesus Christ except he looked like shit. I went over and asked "where is Belial?", he said he was ruling over his jungle Gensokyo, and that he had his cat Chen rape him.
I was in a room proclaiming myself the King of Touhou and this guy said "oh yeah? then what's Majan?" I said nothing because I didn't know so he and some bitch snickered. I looked it up and it was just an alternative name for Makai so I grabbed an empty bottle of Kirin and started beating his ass
I was living in a mansion, a Dark Souls "SuNlighT" came in wearing overalls and challenged me to a fight. I said "overalls? Ok but let me put on some too." I went into my room to change but the faggot kept peeking into my room, upon seeing my wall of anime goddess posters he started leaving. I asked "where're you going?", he just said "you're cool" then left. I went to another mansion, where I had a bunch of followers gathered. Bernkastel appeared with some chocolate on her fingers, offering her hand to me. I asked "uh, that's good chocolate, right?" somehow suspecting the possibly of shit, but then licked it off for a bit, though I saw I didn't finish it all so I had her let me lick some more. Then I was picking some foul gunk out of this cat scratching post of hers while swearing and cursing about it being caused by stupid faggots, a girl said something about me being cool but not liking the way I curse and that I'm kind of flabby. A dazed fellow suddenly appeared in the room, Bernkastel was scared of him because apparently he had a bee aura and she was allergic to bees. I noticed he was wearing Yukari's clothes(except with a green tabard) so I became pissed off. I asked him "what the fuck do you think you're wearing in front of me?", he said "what?" I said "I'm the King of Touhou, Husband of Yukari Yakumo, why the fuck are you wearing her clothes in front of me?" He said "what? who?" so I shout "off with his head!" and said something about making an elixir out of him to cure Bern's bee allergy. An executioner started dragging him off towards a torture chamber and I heard a chainsaw start revving up. I thought about how the screaming would upset the girls so I shout "close the door!"
In the year before my 21st birthday I dreamt I turned into a black dragon with a purple "arcane reaper" arcing off of its wing, and for some reason I was going to get another one for my other wing. On my 21st I wished something like "I wish to have whatever I want no matter what the cost is to anyone else", later that day I happened to be given another cake, so I made the same wish again.
I had two very long purple dildo-things. I was playfully streaming them about, Yukari was there so I poked her in the face with them for fun. Irritated, she pulled out her singular, giant, cosmic dildo-thing, and struck me which sent me flying awa. A cosmic tear with beautiful space was visible along the ground I had been pushed back along.
Yukari was singing a song to me as I was waking up once, "it's all my fault, I wanted to be your master, without you I used to masturbate every day, you can summon me any time"
I was reading a Lovecraft novel, it was realistically playing out in front of me as I read, I saw a very beautiful country road, a limozine came along and a messenger of the devil dressed in a red suit came out, saying that in 2027 I will give The Key to The Devil's son and go beyond The Gate, implying that I would take over Yukari's job of dreaming reality for her.
Trapped in endless dreams of being stuck in rooms hanging around annoying idiots. I kept going back to sleep to try and dream something decent. I finally broke out of the room, outside was Sakuya with a Japanese announcer guy who could never stop talking. After a bit I found a moment, pulled her aside, and basically said "hey lets go have sex". She said "oh thank god, every part of my body is screaming for me to become a bank for normalfaggot sperm." Since we happened to be in a pharmacy all of a sudden, she used timestop to gather all kinds of stim drugs into my hand and mixed it into a paste. I asked if I take it now or later, she said later. We went off and had sex for several days straight, with lots of pegging.
In bed, Yuuka was possessed by Gut's demon baby who was the demon Murmur. Fetal flesh occasionally flickered over her right eye as we had tonnes of sex.
I fucked Satori a ton and produced a whole army of all different kinds of monsters, which made me think she was like Echidna.
I was with Yukari and Satori and Satori had read both me and Yukari's hearts' deepest desires. Mine was to eat Yukari out while jacking off her futanari cock into a baby bottle while Yukari's was simply to get proneboned by me. Satori told me and I said "yeah right, Yukari's desire could be any dude in 'his world'" she responded "it's you". I kept saying "could be anyone" she kept insisting "it's you."
Me and the Yakumo family were residing in a strange house floating in a fog-filled void, and that people that really wanted to join the Yakumo family added to our spirit, in very much the same way as the story The Strange High House in the Mist.
I visited Kingsport, it was very beautiful town covered in snow. I had visited to sample some of their famous peaches. I waited atop a hill until dusk, then slid down it all the way to where the tide had come in. I watched the sunset colour the mist and waters beautifully while Alstroemeria's Mistiness played, then observed water passing over a large war mural that the tide had partially submerged, When water passed over it there was a strange visual effect upon the stone. I saw a black cat out over the waters, then from behind me an old lady said I wasn't supposed to be here, waking me up.
In my unit, it was very dark and my mind was disturbed. The power was out and my lighters all seemed dead though I kept trying them over a candle. I wandered the unit looking for another lighter, I heard some normal human noise from outside which somehow frightened me so I tried to lock the door but actually unlocked it, it blew open so I shut and locked it. I went back to trying dead lighters over a candle and eventually observed the candle was lit but by an extremely dim blue flame. At the same time, like a parallel dream, I was a doctor who was calling himself Nyarlathotep. I was making a stir in the medical community by claiming supernatural causes for illnesses, at one point observing a patient who seemed to die without cause though I saw him gnawed to death by invisible black rats and called it "pathos." At an award ceremony, there was a black shaman guy who had a little black snake ringed around holes in his nose and brow. He said my findings were great but asked whyever was I calling myself Nyarlathotep? I said it was to get his attention because I wanted to ask him a wish, to make Yukari all mine. He said it would be granted, but never to take his Lord's name again or else, and I knew "else" meant punished by being sent to eternal darkness.
Participating in a strange mad petanque curling colosseum race game arranged by Mergo. Before it started I flapped with my arms up to Mergo's platform and saw he looked like a 6 foot parrot with the posture/bodyshape of a penguin. Someone said Mergo didn't like being observed so I flapped my arms out of there. Whoever won would have their wish granted so I wished for Yukari to be all mine, but I had no idea how to play the damn game and came last, pissed off that I was even dragged into it. At some point Etna came up to me, flashed hypnotic eyes which made me fall asleep, then wake up having creamed myself. I had a silver ring representing that I was Hecate's chosen on my left pinky.
I left a party house, in the sky I saw a cloud shaped like an eye with a star for a pupil. I walked down the road for some time before I became stalked by a Large Huntsman. I would shoot a bullet at it whenever it got too close which would make it distance itself. Eventually I ran out of bullets and, becoming half lucid, remembered another dream where Es told me to say "Es protect me" when I was in trouble. She didn't come so instead I tried flying, but all I could do was slowly float up into a tree, the Large Huntsman waited and watched me from below. Time passed and a dozen of them had gathered around watching me but Yukari, sporting Renko's hat and a Chikage, dived into the fray taking them on, so I came down from the tree pulling out my own Chikage to join her.
Me Yukari and Ran were guarding a painting. It started to disappear bit by bit, we wondered why and it turned out it was because Ran had left a cap off of some bottle. I said "that's so stupid, it sounds like something Chen would do" then pointed at her and laughed, Yukari pointed and laughed with me. A tiger youkai attacked the human village, it turned itself into a trail of flame that spread down the path and went up inside every household. Me Yukari and Ran were going about trying to save as many people as we could. I turned into a bear and was floating by one household's second story window pawing at it to get the attention of a family inside. Rhe kid amongst them noticed me and said "mommy there's a bear" she said "what? oh wow you're right."
I drew a picture for Yukari that she was showing off to the household like a mother shows off a children's picture. It had Yukari on the far left, with Ran to her right labeled as her third fox shikigami, me scribbled poorly to her right labeled as Yukari's fourth fox shikigami, then three or so young fox children lined up behind us.
In Irithyll, using Ledo's and invading alongside Shou. I finished off the host near the entrance to the Water Reserve tower. I figured that since I'd be sent back to my world I chucked myself down into the reserve and Shou did too. Somehow we managed to survived the fall, we went over to a guy who was handing out what looked like Fading Souls though me and Shou consumed them like Humanity. I had consumed over 30 or so before the guy ran out and, only made hungrier by being fed, I was equipping a Dark Hand to drain him with, but Byakuren shows up, appalled at what I was making her disciple do, and dragged her off.
At Myouren temple, I was a red snake youkai. There was a group photo with the temple crew and I purposely kept out of shot because I knew touhou fans didn't want to see a male touhou. Afterwards Byakuren tried to hypnotise me but I resisted, then laughed in her face.
In a crowded lounge with a fair few people. I had a lot of beautiful badges of Yukari on my coat. Nue was there and she said she would sell me her trident for $4 & 2¢. I took it and she asked if I could charge it. I imagined energy flowing into it which made it burn with red and blue flames. She walked out of her position in the longue, I kneeled where she was and when she walked backwards into position she gave me a face-full of ass then said "Ugh! Die! Die! Die!"
At a casino, there was a game going on with a crowd gathered to play. My turn came, I rolled and it was a dud like all the people before me so I called it rigged. One of the owners chided me saying it wasn't. The next person rolled and got to be able to play, they made another roll, landing in a position where they could roll for a bonus, the bonus landed on "never" which meant their turn was never over which was an instant jackpot. This made Nue appear in the center of the room, before anyone else could react I ran over, hugged her and we descended into something like deep space together.
A limo and butler were arranged to take me over to some rich person from Asia's place. I went to use the toilet before going. At some point the butler burst into the bathroom so I yelled "fuck off!" at him until he exited, then some kids burst into after a bit and ignored me as they looked at a tiny little Chen who was hiding under the sink. After a bit Chen went Super Saiyan then started screaming insanely loudly, such that I fled the house and ran dozens of meters away but still felt like I was right next to her getting my head split open.
Chen said she wasn't afraid of disappearing. Years later, I read Ex:Oblivione, then I dreamt that Chen appeared and said she wasn't afraid of oblivion.
Hina and I were going to have sex. I said "wait, when I do the slightest sexual thing in a dream I immediately cream the bed" she said "ew". We went to find a condom(not as if it would help my real self at all), found one and were doing it when we realised we were being watching by a demon child Hina had given birth to. We were immensely freaked out and called Reimu like she was police, all shaken up and hugging eachother. We were telling her to do something about it but Reimu sensed the demon child didn't have ill will and thought of Hina as his big sister, not that it wasn't still creeping us out.
Playing an alternative Touhou series. In the first game I was playing as Goku, he could charge a Kamehameha, occasionally doing a quick diagonal spin so if you released it well-timed you'd clear the screen. I switched to the second game and was playing as a team of Yuyuko and someone else. Yuyuko had a butterfly spread shot that inflicted poison but did very little damage and couldn't even finish stage 1 fairies herself without switching to her partner.
In a car, I had a little bundle of needles in the the cup holder for my spellcard "Flying Needles of Death"
A guy had Yukari cast a spellcard on me "Me and Onii-chan are One"
I had been abandoned for a long time. In the paddocks behind a house I was waiting, having devolved into a Lost Child of Antiquity that was possessed by the "Pure Sparks". Touhou characters came to retrieve me, Akyuu was the first to get close. When she did I faced her and raised my arms towards the sky which made powerful blue sparks start gathering around her. Another character threw poison knives into her back, to make her blood more conductive, then at the last split-second, before a massive lightning strike incinerated her, Aya appeared kneeling on the ground and hugged Akyuu which negated the lightning, I figured because of Disgaea elemental logic air = lightning and Aya is a master of wind. I was turned back into a human, from the paddocks I looked up towards the house and saw Akyuu looking at me, she seemed a little traumatised and wasn't walking over to talk because of her weak body.
Come across Junko who had a bunch of naked little children fawning over her, I was made aware of a title of hers "Symbol of Mankind's Sinfulness"
Watching the plot of a Stephen King book, it was about a NEET standing on a little rock close to the shore, over time many little jellyfish started gathering around him. He began to become quite creeped out by them so he flew away. The next part involved a videogame with many brain enemies. After this part was over, a caption appeared on screen saying in blue "Eirin Yagokoro xxxxxxxx people saved", then another one saying in blue "Junko xxxxxxxx people saved" but for a second it flashed in red "Junko xxxxxxxx people corrupted".
Saw a picture of Junko in space with two violet Mindless Self Indulgence stars at her sides, they overlapped to make an inverted pentagram, and "666" was printed a couple of times.
I was going to take a silvery Lunarian elixir that would cure a drug dependancy but Junko was there, about the leave the room in tears, so I said I wouldn't take it.
Saw Hecatia and Junko sitting up in bed together, Suika was beside the bed and had been giving Hecatia a weird look. Hecatia sighed, having had enough, since Suika had a habit of imagining her with animal heads and not saying anything, so she cast a curse on her making her mute.
In a classroom, the back row of seats was filled with people cosplaying as Bloodborne Great Ones. I was standing at the front of class cosplaying as Blacksmith Andre. I went outside and saw a fighting game playing out. Junko was fighting someone and used her ultimate move which summoned a little sun above her head while giving her hyper armour, her opponent hit her and was stunned the sun started brightly shining as they were burnt to death while Junko flew upwards. Afterwards I'm with Hecatia and Junko, a guy shows up to threaten us so Hecatia points a finger gun at him. He puts his hands up like it's serious but then snatches the "gun" away from her and points back, Hecatia and Junko run off then it turns into a Scooby Doo like back and forth where they were taking the gun from eachother and running around.
In a classroom that was actually inside the ladder shortcut house near the deacons at Pontiff. I sung the "Nen song" which consisted of me saying nen over and over, at one point turning into the classic Batman theme for a bit, then back into nens until I got tossed out of the building. Then I was Izanami, I had a curved greatsword duel with someone but lost because I was acting cocky. An Archdeacon came to my corpse, he revived me by putting his hand on my head, as I rose up I put my hand on his and told him to take his rest as he slumped over and died. Deformed butterfly wings sprouted out of his corpse and I retrieved a rotten egg from between them. I took this egg to a dirty shed laboratory where a scientist put it in an aquarium which made it explode in foul smelling dirty plumes, someone said "wasn't me." After a moment a giant white lemur leaped out of the tank, as tall as a man if it stood upright, with big white eyes surrounded by a ring covered in eyes like a Third Umbilical Cord. I started panicking shouting "it's an undead Great One!" repeatedly, since it was born from a rotten egg, but this only made it mad. Its eyes would flash yellow when annoyed then red when upset, it flailed at me until I stopped acting foolish. I was carrying around a flip-phone it had turned into, it had a big white home button that turned yellow and red like before. I could travel around the Universe so I went to a "Rance" planet but the name was coincidental, a poor farming planet where I was shunned for being a half-Great One. Some annoying people from school were following me around so I said "why the hell are you people following me?" Behind me Junko opened her mouth to answer and I said "I didn't mean you, that would be rude."
I run into Flandre, she said "I am Amygdala" before turning into him and trying to crush me, so I ran off.
Someone made a picture of me with Cthulu for a stand, his ability was to open portals, so my ability was just like Yukari's.
Someone summoned the SDM characters to fight against me. Mima came to my rescue, she had the overpowered move of freezing the opponent and simply erasing them line by line by swiping her finger from side to side. She killed Sakuya, killed Patchy, killed Remi, then Flandre, whose symbol was a red hourglass that appeared behind her, took an extremely long time to erase. She idly chatted with us as we erased her. Eventually she was left barely alive in a powerless bound state, then Mima left. I thought I should finish off Flan though she tried to warn me not to, doing so unleashed the true final boss Meiling, and Mima wasn't around to save me.
Met a young blonde boy at a party, he said I looked like I was in my 40's to which I replied "I'm 24!" I took him home and he flew in a spiral around me and transformed into Yukari.
In one room in a house, I was smashing someone I hate's head with a model train, and kept doing so until after they were dead and their head was just a bloody pulp that I kept smashing. Then I'm in a dark room with all my favourite characters who had been watching, Mima was laughing uncontrollably while Yukari beside her can't help but laugh a little along with her before saying "he can prove his love for me, even as an old man." I say "I'm not old!" before going over to hug her, then I see a grumpy lordly loli Yukari sitting in a big recliner so I go over and hug her too.
At a beach, riding a jet ski but going way too fast. I spun out of control and it flew out from under me. A shark circled around before taking a bite out of me, Enma Ai flew nearby and told me not to mess around but after noticing it had taken a bite said "now it has Gensokyo DNA". She levitated it into a giant plastic bag with water and floated it over the beach into the jungle. On the beach I saw a sign that had written on it the birth and death dates of 8 human lives of Yukari, the first life being perhaps around the 1400's and the last death being in 2012.
I was a vengeful spirit that had possessed someone lining up for an assembly led by Mima. I told my host "feel my negativity" but I couldn't seem to summon up very much. I left him and found a little moon ornament like Patchouli's that in the dream I thought was Mima's. Mima could see me and asked me to sit next to her, I did so and gave her the ornament. Mima spoke to the assembly, "everyone is in their own world, on their own deserted island of loneliness, to understand that is to be a soldier, and if you did that then even Rance would let you stick a sword into the rock behind his temple"(fuck his ass). Me and the other guys grimaced at the last bit.
With Rance on a big bed, we were celebrating a movie release, the only thing I remembered about it was that Ran(in the dream I thought of the Touhou but who knows) died halfway through. Rance celebrated by making a party ball rise off the top of his hyper weapon which sprayed confetti all over the bed in the direction of a girl that was there. Just a little bit of confetti got on me so I said "oi oi, do that over again" The previous confetti disappeared as he did so but some of it got on me again. Later I'm around him and various Touhou characters, I say "keep your hands off my women" and was surprised by his compliance.
In the Rance world doing various things, somehow I became under the impression that Yukari was a Rance character, the thought of which made me really worried so when I woke up I was relieved.
A guy with a pet tiger said he's going to have to wait an insanely long time to make one of my girls his. His tiger comes over and gnaws me a bit so he holds it back while I pet it until it stopped seeing me as an intruder.
Yukari had followers of hers all over the world meditate as dragons who embodied the environments around them, she then reset the world back to the age of gods, however there had been a "anti-mythological world serum" which rendered the world's population as black sludgey hateful zombies. In the next dream I passed under a ladle hanging from a shed into a pocket dimension where I told one of Yukari's followers about the serum after looking it up on Bloodborne wiki.
Two little jellyfish washed up on a beach, there was a large crowd gathered but noone came near but me and a village elder. It was Yorihime and Toyohime who came to deliver a speech, at a hall they were in human form and had talked for a while, afterwards nobody clapped except me. Afterwards hen Yorihime passed close-by she gave me a lovely smile. There had been a few strange alien monsters(like Saya no Uta) around the hall's edge, an alien contagion spread around which caused a lot of chain vomiting. In the dream after this I see Yorihime come out of a house. I stare at her with a smile and think "oh gods I love you" but she just sneers back at me.
Saw Hanekawa cosplaying as Sakuya on my bed, she told me "take it easy."
At a gathering of waifufags , there was a seat reserved for a Sakuyafag which I took until he came and asked me to move.
There was a martial artist girl who was probably Meiling but only referred to as "Ass Puncher" because she launched her crime fighting partner around by punching him in the ass. She, him and Medicine came into a house with a safe they were guarding. Meiling and her partner left the safe on a table and went into the kitchen to talk about something, leaving me and Medicine in the lounge. There was strong winds outside causing spooky psithurism, Medicine covered her ears and said she hates the sound of the wind, so I covered her in a bunch of thick blankets. Since no-one was looking I unlocked the safe. Within was a red physialis in its cage, I took it and ate it. Medicine had taken off her blankets and went over to the kitchen to alert the others. Meiling said she would have to make me throw that up or something bad will happen. I quickly ran outside, jumping fences but Meiling kept up with me, I took a defensive stance while she punched the air in front of me which caused wind pressure I could feel from several feet away, though I was able to dodge her quick attacks.
I had died, I was a blood red rat that had constantly dyed itself with fresh victims. A yama that looked like a big generic white blobby ghost was there, obscenely tired and eager to pass a hell sentence upon me so it could go back to sleep. I did my best to stall, I brought up Okina and equated her with Allah, which I said meant "pardon", but the judge wasn't having any of what I said. It seemed about to pass judgement when I shouted "look at this!", turned my back and flashed a full back tattoo of Okina with a red python draped around her, the snake flew out of the tattoo, constricted the judge, posssessed it, then Okina pardoned me for my sins.
At a convention in Japan. I had my own booth for something but since I barely knew Japanese I was avoided. Nearby there was a famous twitter girl who had a godform persona, but she somehow forgot about it. In Gensokyo, Reimu was drinking tea on the shrine's veranda when Suwako comes beside her and says "humans being so forgetful with their godforms are such a pain" before leaving off. She found the girl's godform and challenged it to the death, it didn't go without a fight but Suwako was really strong. Back to the con, the girl was curled up on the floor acting infantile along with her godform beside her in the form of an infant.
I was with Suwako, she was sadistically stabbing me with needles.
I completed a game which involved becoming one of Okina's god servants, in a kitchen a window had a bunch of stars on it. I had got the bad ending, which meant I still had become a god, but Okina, who appeared by the window, was disappointed in me.
Mai was arguing with a guy through a window, they kept bickering until I slammed the window shut. We were sitting around a table, the guy Mai argued with was sitting next to her. She gave him a biscuit and pet him on the head like he was a dog. I said "please do me next!" so she did so, but I pointed out that the act of condencension didn't work when I was seated higher than her, and Satono agreed. I thought aloud "Okina is up in the skies compared to you two" but they ignored me while chattering about something else.
In a hall were gathered followers of mine along with many gods, they were going to make me the "7th Lord of Light". I was talking and acting like Dio, telling normalfaggots they were useless and questioned whether they had any faith in the gods. I was standing near some people talking, joining in on their conversation by talking near them but without really getting their attention, someone asked what's with that and I said "just look at my Natal chart" he said "you can't just blame it on your Natal chart" I responded with silence as if to say I could. I thought the Natal chart is like personality crystal that refracts the energy of the cosmos manifesting in what you do. Here's mine by the way https://files.catbox.moe/pdtaus.JPG There was a black pegasus who was said to be a traitor. There was tournament, Izanami showed off the "Dragon Slash", slicing with a blade horizontally and vertically which sent out a shockwave that had no limit to its range. There was a guy who did poorly in the tournament so the audience was quiet, I said "first time clap, first time clap" and they gave him a slight applause. There was a radio talkshow where I girl called in to tell me Pram is her favourite character.
I flew up into space, a giant parade of floats with Eiki at the helm pointing her baton forwards was charging at me. It was the "World Parade", I thought it represented the world itself. At the sides of this parade were two planet sized spheres of red corruption rapidly expanding. I used the power of Lambdadelta(or Flandre) to instantly crush the corruption, then formed Es's unsealed murakumo out of blood then ia-slashing straight through the parade before it exploded behind me.
A narration stated: "When the age of the gods ended, and golden light no longer shined down from the heavens, the white Stheno-snake descended from the moon, having grown afraid from mankind's tales of great heroes and warriors, and put humanity under a hypnotic spell." A game started with a boss battle against the World Parade with Enma Ai riding the Stheno-snake, a guy character cosplaying as Arturia slew it, using a series of slashes trying to imitate Excalibur but they created black-purple spikes like Nine's Everlasting Shorl. After the battle I was talking to a fairy, it called me Satan which earned an offended demonic howl from the distance, there was a dialogue option which would reset the game and make you fight the Stheno-snake again which I accidently took a couple of times since the option defaulted to yes. There were two gigantic apes crawling towards one another from opposite ends of the world, one hounded by a giant leech and plagued with disease, the other permanently chilled by strong frost, it was said that when they reach eachother the world will end.
I flew around a primary school, I saw Eiki sitting with some others so I went over and, since she was small, I put her on my lap, which annoyed her.
I was having sex with the female cast of Symphonic Rain on a big bed when Eiki appeared and started lecturing me, but Kasadani Kyouko appeared behind her, with a horsecock, and gave it to Eiki who cried "but I didn't want to be sexed..."
I was walking around, aware of Eiki looking down at me through the "ceiling" of the world.
I was with Maribel, she seemed to hate me because she talked very rudely. She had the ability to make a mark like https://files.catbox.moe/yt4mzc.png upon objects she laid her palm upon. I had a piece of paper and wanted her to do it in 5 directions to make a star but instead she did it up and across, the boxes filled in with blue and red coloured times-tables. I pointed out a flaw in it which made her say "shut up."
Met Maribel again a few years later, acting just as rude as before, she and Renko were in charge of a crane game machine.
I was talking to someone about a Touhou fighting game, he said he really liked Renko's Positron Cannon super. I sighed with disgust and said that move's broken as hell, he said he just liked it because it's the only move in the game that makes Patchy go "mukyuu!"
Walking along a shed when on its wall an image of Yumemi was projected and she shouted "you're possessed!" I managed to feel possessed by her but was aware it was a mental state and I didn't act quickly I'd start doubting it. I tried to fly, levitating with my feet dragging across the ground for a little bit before properly taking flight. I landed on a platform atop some trees and flipped a double middle finger to the house of normalfags I'd come from.
I was at a dinner table with an old online 2hufag "Voxelation" I used to talk to, Patchouli was teaching us dining posture and manners that would condition us to astrally project. Vox said "still, I can't believe Patchy isn't a loli" I said "there's all kinds of each Touhou, an adult Patchy, a sober Suika, a no-nonsense Sumireko..." Sumireko was next to me bending a spoon while making a silly face.
Reimu snuck into a slumber party, taking the place of one of the participants. They gave eachother mimikaki and some other stuff while each one of them realised it was Reimu who snuck in while taking their own special interest in her, one of them being Sariel who took pleasure in interpreting the meaning behind her prayers.
I encountered PC98 Alice in a mall, she said "you're in a dream, but are you just gonna wake up?" I said "I hope not." We walked around together, she told me she was very disappointed in Windows Alice, at one point she turned into a cat, entered a bakery and they gave her milk.
Yuyuko had "died", being sealed in a submarine on the ocean floor. Vampire Hunter D dived down, retrieved her spirit and she was revived. Someone commented on a half-vampire managing to do this. Yuyuko went over to a grumpy middle-age Reimu and joked with her much to her unamusement.
I scaled a long narrow stone bridge that led up to a mountain covered in dragons. I felt their gazes upon me but none of them came down so I figured none of them could bother to eat me. I went all the way up then came back down with four palm-sized dragon orbs, two of red and blue. Someone commented on a genderbent version of myself and I said "yeah, I make a pretty good girl too don't I?" Someone asked if I ever considered suicide and I said "it would have been an annoying setback." I gave one red orb to a follower and one blue orb to another and kept one of each for myself since I was "Lord of Destruction."
I was told that "researching", playing and getting good at Touhou games, is "Neutral Evil."
I was marching down a long hallway to go drive Flandre out of the basement. I was consuming large gemstones. I was possessed by a black dragon, I had Disgaea stats with 0 resistance which meant I was a "home for curses." A dryad told me flawless crystals could increase my RES so I went into a shop that was selling some. There were Touhou games there but I said I wasn't interested in any Touhou game that didn't have ZUN involved. Instead of a flawless gem I bought some liquid crystal to spray on my skin. I was walking along when I managed to trip over nothing very hard straight into a pole, but turned my head and my headphones cushioned the blow. Sakuya was nearby watching me with a look of disgust over how inelegant that was, she told me since Flan was gone from the basement she was going to lock me down there. I said "no! at least let me take a Flan doll!" and she said she would let me take a Sakuya doll.
ZUN said "Flandre with Black Knight Greatsword represents Strength."
I was making my way around a maze minimap with random encounters that were fights against prinnies in a library, simultaneously Touhou Station had ZUN and the other guests playing a Wheel of Fortune word guess game, the hint being someting about camping equipment. I made my way to the top center room of the map and sticking out of the roof were Yukari's feet with her cute socks dangling.
Yukari woke out of The Matrix, she had apparently done so once before, there was a giant boss guy with some others who had her reimprisoned in a capsule that spun around extremely fast while images were flashed into her eyes so fast the brain couldn't tell it wasn't reality.
I was with some sages, one had a bunch of coloured crystals like Go-qualia's Requiem floating around her while she concentrated on trying to gather them in a certain way. I said "why don't you have the trigrams for "gathering" on your tabard?" she said "that'd be copying." Yukari showed up asking for help with something, I went with her as we walked over some dark hills avoiding the light, we came to an arcade machine sitting on a hill. She controlled the bullets and movement while I could create a little cloud platform for her and bomb. She went to a point where I made a cloud for her and shot at something that was the objective while bullets flew at her. At one point she was walled, I pressed bomb a split-second too late, but we had another life. This time she finished it off without issue, the high-score screen had her with me as Jigglypuff on her lap, and Yuyuko sitting back-to-back with her with Kirby on her lap. We then went over to a little stage with a bunch of seats before it that had 6 or more Yukaris seated around. Ran appeared but with only 4 or 5 tails, Yukari said some Japanese words, maybe the four gaurdian's names, as tails flew and bound themselves to Ran until she had 9. Also on stage was a grimoire with info on various religions, I checked the page for Shinto and it just had half-page dedicated to it saying the Nihon Shoki was faith constructive while the Kojiki was faith destructive.
I was walking with a couple of Yukaris, I saw another Yukari up on the treetops struggling with a Demon's Souls Storm Beast she had stuck a harpoon into. The three of us got on a dilapidated wooden elevator those rose up while shaking worryingly, I said if it fell I'd grab them both and die to cushion their fall, they responded that She wouldn't like that, while looking up at the sky.
I was looking up into space, past the stars I saw a dim image of Yukari looking down back at me with lovehearts all around her.
I was seeing an image of Yukari's corpse lying face up with cloudy eyes and several purple streaks of rot on her skin, a deep eldritch voice spoke to me "recall this image whenever your stupid happy mind takes over."
As I walked past a Yukari wearing a mask who had been made very busy by coronashit, I gave her a sympathetic pat on the shoulder. Nearby was another Yukari sitting with Yuyuko taking it easy.
I was in a classroom with Yukari teaching us, she went to go take something out of an oven so I asked "why can't she just take it out through a gap?" the guy next to me said "I wonder how many fragments she must be split into she lacks the power to even use a gap."
At a school I come across a black dressed teacher and ask her to teach me so I can summon Yukari. She tells me about using an image and brings up . Behind her was a photo with several guys posing while dressed as Yukari, she laughs and I laugh for a split-second before saying "it's not funny."
Me and some others were discussing our unique Shinto, the mascot of my way was a Yukari fumo, another guy had a chibi zombie. I encounter black teacher again but I was just a dreaming me with no knowledge of whatever she might have taught me in dreams, she was so enraged by me forgetting what I've taught her she and the zombie guy started trying to kill me, I was suddenly inside a Globe of Death as I chanted Yukari's name to wake up as the teacher shouted "curse you Ben Jeremiah!"
Kaguya was taking a fiance, they had to be a special place at exactly 12:13am, which is apparently a special time, I just missed it but Yukari rewinded time and then I successfully did it.
Yukari had me mindbreak Kaguya by mindbreaking her friend, likely Eirin, after which they were left grudgeful and insane.
I was playing my character Flandre Scarlet in Dark Souls 3, wearing Dragonslayer Armour and a crown as I muse to myself "just like Gilgamesh..." I received texts from Rika Furude saying "I'm rich :3 ask me for anything you want."
I was with Wander during the opening bit in Shadow of the Colossus where the shadows rise up. We ran up to the top-most platform before the altar where the girl was set since it was blessed, instead of weakling humanoids we were assaulted by two badass shadows with demonic claws, one clawing at us from each side of the altar, Wander slashed one of them up with lightning quick blows while I was distracting the other.
I saw vaguely remembered images of Dormin along with Eua.
I was told what people refer to as "The Source is actually called "Thordenki", Thor-Odin-Loki.
I was asked to name Great Ones so I rattled off a few names, Mergo, Amygdala, Maple Wizen.
I was watching the news, there was a little girl who had been caught in a wild fire but miraculously survived. She said it was due to the divine protection of Woden and a red maple leaf she had, I cried at the TV "No! Wrong! It was Maple Wizen!"
I was at Yhorm the Giant's house, it was a classroom that had a dozen or so children and Cornyx present. One of the children was a baby with tiny devil wings called "flan flan", I asked "are you Flan?" she responded by flapping her wings hard trying to fly for a second. A couple of invaders appeared, Yhorm chased after them for a bit, for some reason Cornyx threw a pebble at him to redirect his attention which made him start chasing him instead, the invaders had been running so hard they ran off a cliff without realising it, I got the Boulder pyromancy and thanked Cornyx for his sacrifice. I went back to the house, in the back corner was Mu-12, I got excited, went over calling her a goddess which made her say demurely "I'm just an ordinary girl". I stared into her eyes and saw a vision of a colourless ornate clock with three hands and a rose with pulsed three times going about a third of a revolution each time. I snapped out of it to see her relieved, saying I nearly saw something I shouldn't have. She started calling me a an Abyssal Hellcat of Izanami, chasing me and demanding I battle her but I kept teasing her "no way, I don't wanna fight you" and fleeing.
Yukari was talking shit "I am the boundary between day and night, Violet and Vermillion, and Death is my bitch." Later I walk with her into a room with Hades Izanami and her alliance of "Demons and Gods Against...", I thought about Yukari calling death her bitch earlier and looked behind me to see her quietly backing out of the room.
I was in Irithyll where the giants lie, there was a guy pissed off at me for trespassing on what he considers his paradise. I ask "is it your Jack of Eden?" He says "Yeah it's my Jack of Eden, my Shangri-la, (etc etc)" Somehow I manage to get along with him, we rode on a motorcycle to a house along with Yuugi. Yuugi said I was possessed by Hecatia and that she had heard creepy poltergiest footsteps coming from a few meters underground trying to spook her, and I had a shade of Worldy Sage Marisa hanging around me. I somehow get lost in a different town so Black Phantom Bang Shishigami was summoned to escort me home. I say "thanks" as he was leading me through an underground passage but he responds "gay." I say "sorry" so he says "gay". He expresses regret over not having Litchi, I mention having girls and he says he's had over 8 billion women but doesn't care for it compared to Litchi. I say that's how I feel about Yukari, he soften up a bit so I offer a high five, he says "gay" so I offer a brofist which he accepts.
I had a big Marisa hat and was acting like a wicked witch until a teacher got sick of my behavior, took it off me and tore it to shreds. I gathered the pieces up thinking of having it fixed up but after carrying it for a little bit I couldn't be bothered and dropped them.
Hecatia told me she's going to copy and paste her ego over mine like its a threat and that its coming soon.
I was character cosplaying as Hecatia in DS3, the real Hecatia was summoned against me as Spear of the Church. I tried using Firewhip like the crappy spell it is in game while she used a spell that summoned a blue orb above her head shooting soul arrows in three directions spinning around. I died, and got a judgement screen from her that was mostly praise for me except for something about sodomy.
Encounter Hecatia in DS3 using glitch tech beyond my comprehension, rapidly doing spins and cancels of Crystal Souls Spears on the spot like she was threatening me. I prostrated, and was happy that she let me tag along since I wanted to watch her play.
I came across Clownpiece and she was my wife that I had already had a child with.
Hecatia took my semen from me in a squeezing not fun way.
Encountered the fusion of Yukari Ran and Chen from this picture and it took my semen in a squeezing not fun way.
I said "I'm God, The Devil, and Orin."
On a bed, I had Simon's Necronomicon and Orin was there. I asked her if she had ever been able to escape reality, she said no with a look like she's sorry, I said I wasn't discouraged.
I was at the end of a long drive into country wilderness, I checked my phone and saw Hecatia had sent messages from me to everyone I knew making me say farewell and implying I was going to Gensokyo. She then said to me "you're free, but can a NEET love?"
On the phone with someone I presume to be Hecatia who said that because I saved her she will save me and that it's a one for one.
At a psytrance music awards, I was called up and when I accepted my award I beatboxed the sound at the beginning of Mohican Sandbag's 可愛くないりふれーん
I became lucid so I wanted to teleport to Gensokyo but for some reason didn't want to do so while anyone was watching. I looked around, visited a water park and watched some narwhals balancing on artificial waves for a bit. See a forest so I enter thinking it's the perfect place to teleport from, but a werewolf starts chasing me, I ran through the forest and out to sea but the seafloor would rise up so the werewolf could keep chasing me until I found a platform switch that flattened it back down. I entered a submarine in a room with a nerdy guy and a bunch of protractors and stuff hanging around. Through conversation I find out it's a few decades into the future, I had been a Touhou hero who had disappeared, I asked what happened to the franchise and he implied it went bad because of mobage. I left to another room when it turned into a REOL music video where she was opening up lockers that had all different colours of standard diving dressed as she sung "I just can't get enough! I just can't get enough!"
There was a train station and outside I saw some Touhous, probably Yukari and Yuyuko. Then I was with a couple of people I know from school, they said I was right that dreams were the real reality before they started hounding me, I transformed into a rat and ran away until I found and entered Yuyuko's house. It was a comfy grandmother's home, she called me hysterical and started making me a bath. There was a poem on the wall about "The flowers that wouldn't bloom in ugly places."
In a classroom, we had to pair up so I looked for Yukari but saw she was already paired with Yuyuko. I heard that they had once gone on a long journey together.
I was acting jealous of Yuyuko, because I'm Yukari's second favourite person after her.
With another guy, we were on the brink of being consumed by darkness, he was completely absorbed and disappeared into a Pure Land where he lived a serene idyllic life for an absurdly long time before dying.
I narrowly decided not to enter a youkai booth from the future, they were apparently extremely strange. I could see Eirin in the far distance watching with a smile as I come across a wrinkly crone with spooky black eyes like abysses with dust swirling around inside them. I barely managed to bring myself to drag my gaze and look into the bottom left corner of her eyes for a moment but after I did she said that I was a genius that would have 5 sons. I responded "Sons? Nooo! I wanted daughters!" I was trapped in a little pocket dimension classroom where I had to study Hitler. Since I didn't to bother doing so a blackhole opened up sucking me in, but believing in my Yakumo family and clinging in a chain to Chen Ran and Yukari we escaped.
I was driving a truck with Remi and Flan, at some point I stopped and they had disappeared. I looked around and found them placed in a zoo exhibit like animals and looking awfully hairy. I was hanging with the crowd outside it wondering how to get them back when Snow White appeared, sniffed the air and said "I smell a virgin." All the guys present shot their hands up like they thought they'd get sex out of it as she sniffed around until she stood in front of me then she took a black shit upon my dick.
With Yukari in Gensokyo. I said "I wanna touch your pussy!" and she said "that's because you're a dirty sex boy". "Sex Boy" apparently was my nickname in Gensokyo.
I had impregnating sex with Meiling in front of a heater while another girl watched.
I was having sex with Orin, we were extremely loud. During a break the other people in the house complained to us and we asked in a dazed "huh? we were loud?" before we went back to fucking loudly.
I was a manservant to a rich girl who had adopted me, she was naked except for her panties and Remilia hat. She did a playful half-somersault so she was upside down and put a nearby monkey plush on her butt.
Saw Yukari at a shop with brains lined up behind her in wooden square compartment with Japanese names under them, I guy I was with commented "the admin of Gensokyo selling brains on the boundary?"
Asked Yukari what's more important to her, the caretaking of Gensokyo or eating people and she responded with a wicked smile then said "I feel sorry for Koakuma who's only fed fish from the lake." Kids were running off while a few Touhous chased them, Alice made a spinning triangle appear in their path that shot danmaku inwards from its points and I admired the way she had the bullets purposely miss.
Saw Alice and a tall girl ahead of me on a sidewalk so I ran over and asked Alice to teach me witchcraft.
Playing Hyakki-hei, there was a boss fight against red blue and yellow dragons that were chained to little floating square platforms high above, they fought with elemental breath and used their chains to bring platforms crashing down at me. Then I'm at a lobby where I had 魔女 written on my forehead so I could enter past the red rope. I was trying to get a ice cream scoop from the counter but the guy wouldn't sell me a triple scoop because it wasn't on the menu so I was arguing with him until I see Alice Patchy and Marisa fly past the red rope with the three fairies of light so I flew after them. I flew a bit too close behind Alice because she suddenly turned around and smacked me in the head, I said "don't bully me just because I'm a male fairy" Patchy said "it's an understandable reaction considering the things you've done." We came to a stop in the hallway, I entered the lotus position and opened up a portal that we went through where there were some trees and houses in a little ring.
in a classroom talking with ZUN, there was a horrying looking youkai pressed up against one of the windows but we were ignoring it, a guy asked why and we just said "small fry trying to look scary." He said I seemed far older than my age to which I said "ancient, eternal, timeless..." ZUN laughed and said he loved my chuunibyou.
With Keiki and a hanny, I asked it "wont you praise your lord?" but it stood still doing nothing so Keiki stalk dung pied it. I was hanging around Keiki around a large hall and she was generally acting like a badass proud lord.
Had a poster of Keiki with the caption "creating is the secret" and I hid it when a consoomer I know entered the room.
Watching the credits of Sengoku Rance, Orion's toon avatar was wearing Keiki's dress.
Saw a picture of Hecatia, in the bottom right corner was a text saying "only 3 million intelligent souls, destined to be dragged down by those around them." A guy next to me cried upon seeing it, I just thought most anyone would think the artist is up his own ass.
Dancing in a backyard with Hecatia flying around me as I stepped from piece to piece of an image of a broken moon on the ground.
All of humanity was being herded towards a human instrumentality, I went along for a while but ran away, organisers were chasing after me while I fled through a city populated by people who looked like but weren't humans. I got sheltered by a family, talking with the man of the house, he said his kind had to eat 10 specific types of food a day or die, I remember carrots, blood, worms. After a while he said he couldn't shelter me forever so I agreed to be turned in and joined the instrumentality. Afterwards I was floating in a seated position a couple of meters in the air in a backyard. Patchouli came floating upside down over to me and I mused to her "no one could have ever realised our individuality over the doubt."
With a few Touhous on the surface, Parsee was with them and tried to attack me but when I flew up she wouldn't follow since she was afraid of heights when above ground or something. We come across Orin lying unconscious with a smile next to a hotspring, she had a couple of powercords hooked up into monster girl vore mouths at the ends of her tails. Parsee said she was jealous and that Rin must be dreaming about being in heaven right now.
I was in a retail store, Koishi came up to me, groped my crotch for a moment then walked off. Satori comes up to me apologising for her sister before chasing after her.
Satori was offering a date to whoever managed to kill her in DS3, around the steps before the Water Reserve tower I assaulted her with a glitch, shooting a great arrow after rolls. I nearly had her when someone tried to steal the kill. I fought with him and just managed to kill him but Satori came up behind and finished me, after a moment stalk dung pieing the spot where I died.
Having a great lance duel with a guy but after a while I start using glitch which pissed him off. Many glitch artifacts of little heads + third eyes of Satoris and Koishis appear spinning in the air around us, the Koishis had two faces, one self for the head and one self sealed away in her eye.
Unlocked Madotsuki in a JRPG, she came with the character song Alstroemeria's Determine.
Saw a picture of Kokoro on a booru, a playing card Ace of Spades with Uboa as her mask. There was a comment saying with this you wouldn't need the gaphag to have psychedelic experiences.
Saw a couple of very beautiful pictures of Yukari in a big Japanese room with a dividing curtain, one picture was beyond the curtain with Yukari prostrating towards a wall that had a couple of katanas on a stand and a spiraling golden dragon made of light spilling down from above, the other picture had her facing the other direction holding the stand up towards the dragon.
Watching a Touhou anime, the CD release had an extra part at the beginning of the first episode where Junko stood on a hill and flooded the landscape with her tears, whereas originally she only appeared late in the anime.
Okina was in my room and told me she occasionally watches over me but can't interfere with my reality unless I pray to her enough.
At a nature reserve park, at one place near the entrance Orphan of Kos was lurking in the waters. I enter a classroom where they had records of how many tries players had taken to kill the Orphan or if they had given up. I see Okina behind a reception desk, she was a wrinkled hag, then passing by again she's youthful. Later I'm with her and another guy, she was in a daze staring at four-season coloured clouds swirling over a lake. I could tell that they other wanted to take her while she's dazed, haul her off to the nearby castle and have his way with her, but I was going to kill him if he tried.
Okina was tied up in rope by some guy who had been playing with her and praying for golden skin. I beat him up, untied her and took some amulet he had, putting on myself. It did nothing and she said I'd have to start my own prayers for golden skin. I'm in a classroom, I see Okina so I go over and ask to sit next to her, she says "hmm, should I let you?" I said "I'll cry if you don't." We're sitting together watching a powerpoint, a guy sitting to my right says something about how embarassing it would be to be seen on the toilet when the powerpoint changes to a hidden camera footage of him on the toilet which makes me and Okina burst out laughing. Later in perhaps the same classroom, Okina is a black guy with afro and guitar. I call him God of guitars and he says he prefers Lord.
Hecatia told me she's only capable of parlour tricks compared to me.
After a Hecatia thread I made reached bump limit, I dreamt Hecatia and Clownpiece were on my bed rejoicing over receiving new faith.
At a hair beauty contest, there was one Touhou there, maybe Koishi, who I tried but failed to get the attention of. I say to the guy next to me I haven't brushed and it's been a couple of days since I washed my hair. I receive a sketchbook of mine that has drawings that seemed to be by me possessed by Hecate, I believe there was one picture of Hecate with a horse's head. Two pages are stuck together, when I take them apart I find a letter from Miko from Gensokyo, a couple times a number over 200,000 was written with beautiful purple flower calligraphy behind it, I think in response to me asking her how many Shinto gods there were, and the letter closes with her says "I love you! I love you!" Hecate is summoned, she was red head in a long black dress, she said she had trouble about how to appeal to the modern age and whether to come across as old or young. She showed me her cool Myspace with all her favourite things listed on it, it had all her favourite nicknames but I was forgetting them even as I gazed at them. She transformed into Hecatia, more wilder, free feeling, and flew about scattering kunai danmaku, then cast a curse on one guy who had insulted her in one of her threads, making his genitals disappear.
A tengu guy called me cowardly for making delete posts.
Saw ganguro Yukari and Yuyuko spit-roasting a girl.
Fighting off lizardmen generated by greenish "Ihyll blood" and Adversaries, killed them and apprehended a couple of hard cylinder robots trying to flee, Eiki, who had been fighting on my side, came beside me and said to throw them in a vat of acid. I mentioned I had got a bit of the Ihyll blood on me(I had been interested in it) and she told me something to do about it.
In a class with one of the guys who chased me to Yuyuko's house, someone mentioned "Ludo" so I asked "the white whale?" The guy who had chased me argued it was "the white dragon" and that we had argued about this in a dream before, I asked how he remembered but he didn't answer. I'm with a teacher, maybe the black dressed one, I was helping her clean her classroom, she told me to leave and that I wouldn't be paid for this but I said it was out of gratitude for making a Necrofantasia ALR Rewind music video with me. She said she regretted doing that, so I got angry and beat her bloody, she called for help so I walked off acting natural and somehow the crime got pinned on my father who was killed for it. I'm walking with Dr. Kelso, he mentioned what happened earlier with my father, I said yeah I don't care which appalled him and made him call me a sinner. I shrugged and offered him a smoke.
A Japanese artist who had stopped drawing Touhou years ago in favour of making emojis as a business drew a picture of Mike obviously for good luck.
At a Japanese con in a private room with raptor7. He was drawing something on a tablet at his table while I was at another table looking at the picture on a computer screen while jerking under the table and thought he might be jerking as well, and I thought "God this is so fucking weird."
At a mall riding a little train with others, we passed by Yukari in naked tabard changing at some busy lockers so I got jealous. Later I walk around into different shops until I find one with her in it and stay there. She asks "oh? Who were you looking for?" I brush off the question pretending I wasn't looking for her and she laughs "ha! well, I love how you adore me so much."
With Yukari, there was a mirror behind and to the side of her, I saw reflected there long white giant insect arms just like how I imagined Rhan-tegoth's in Horror at the Museum.
I was homeless and my only possession was Simon's Necronomicon, I met a crazy bum who collected grimoires and gave him a showing. I meet Yukari who implies she's Rhan-tegoth and that we're diametrically opposed since she represents the full moon while I represent the moon's dark side. I saw Yukari with a black bob cut in a black car driving into a city while a pop song she released played, it began with a computer female voice saying "I'm hot" repetitively which was annoying but the lyrics were sublime and the I'm hot started clicking with them perfectly while I thought it was just annoying to make it catchier.
Saw Yukari in a bed alone, crying.
Saw Yukari, she looked really sad and silently pointed to a nearby shed before disappearing. I entered it, there were many complex computers, I went over to one and did random shit that was somehow working, a guy comes next to me and says "woah! hacker!"
Yukari was teaching me some songs and said "these songs are the devil that lets you have control over others." I was sitting on a bed with her, somehow I made her cross so I nuzzle into her knees and say sorry, she stays silent but didn't seem angry anymore.
Touring a mansion that belonged to a vampire queen who had lost her form. Then in the next dream I'm with Yukari who shows me a pattern of cards and asks me what they represent. I see the connection and say "the vampire queen the lost her form", she asks how I knew so I said I dreamt about her just before. She asks me what I want so I say I wish Ihad more sweet dreams. She tells me her sexual preferences then sits on my lap as we watch a busy cross walk together, though all the people looked like shadows.
In a Lovecraftian dream city going around to different classes with Yukari and Eirin. I said to them "I wish I could have more time in this dream."
I had a report card that had a white Disgaea nekomata on it that said "butts>boobs" and rating me as A- There was another guy who has called himself a witch in my dreams who was rated F. I was trying to email a copy to myself but realised I was in a dream and questioned a guy next to me whether I should even bother, he say I might as well but then the email wouldn't send anyway. Walking up to a little white mansion, pass a room that had DS1 playing on the TV, near Andre's blacksmith. I go up on a floating platform near the mansion where there was Eirin and Yukari, Yukari calls her suspicious and she replies "I don't want to hear that from you of all people."
Someone saw a little of the text history between me and Yukari and was impressed by the crazy neologisms we used. I was dressed like Yukari but green and black representing Greed(dollar bills) and Death. I was walking around a city with Yukari, someone mentioned God-me and I saw a menacing version of myself looking down from a cloud. The Statue of Liberty was destroyed with some people stranded on its little island, some Touhou characters came to rescue them. A city was being destroyed by someone with the power of Susanoo and Ragnarok, I said all he needed was Izanami and he'd be able to paint waves of destruction however he pleased.
In a kitchen pantry in a big building, I saw an interesting blue dust spice so I took it with me. Encounter Gordon Ramsay and talked with him for a bit. Walking through hallways when Yukari comes telling me to give her the blue spice, I run away from her while teasingly sprinkly some of it back at her until I was chased to a classroom that had some Touhou characters in it including Flan. Yukari says we all having to be sprinkled with that dust or we'll be instantly erased and replaced by an exact clone at a certain time later today. I sprinkled them and her but ran out before myself. Yukari says to come back before lunch time which I thought was kind of negligent and liable to go awry but I shrug and leave the building to explore around a bit. I see a church with Remi and Flan stained glass windows. I try to make my way back before lunch but encounter delays and arrive late. Outside the building was Yukari who looked like an ugly derisive caricature of herself and was slumped over in sadness. I hug her and tell her I probably got some of the dust on me when I was sprinkling back at her and when I did the others, but if she wants to make it up to me then she should marry me. Next scene is a train coming to a stop before I get chased out by her, having teased her so much during the wedding I knew I had to run off and give her a break. I wander around outside for a while before returning to the building and making my way to a room where she and other sagehus were smoking pipes, I sit beside her and lay my head in her arms.
I had been dreaming of Yukari for 10 years and was fluent in kitsune language.
Petting a small kitsune child in fox form laying on my lap to sleep while I sang the last part of DMC4's Shall Never Surrender as a lullaby.
In a classroom, I was stuck in a chair and forced to watch TGWTG/AVGN while I was cussing vehemently and trying to struggle out of my bonds. Yukari watches me with someone nearby and says to them "isn't he cool?"
Was walking with a class in a backyard towards one gate, I become lucid so I shout for Yukari, someone says she's over there and points to a side gate where she was. I go over and ride passenger in her car, ask her something and she says "I try to make sure you don't have too many evil dreams."
Saw Yukari's purple sports car that had HAL9000 on its fuel cap.
Got a bunch of toxic glue all over my hands, I ran around looking for someone to call for ambulance, the first guy I see does nothing for me but points out a little party house. As I go to it I see Yuuka jump from the second floor balcony and wander off. I enter the party, I see Yukari so I run over crying "Yukari-sama! Yukarin-chan!" She gives me a kiss on the lips and when I open my eyes afterwards my hands were healed.
In a classroom, I show a girl a couple of striking images(the kind that becomes a mental image you see when you close your eyes) of Izanami smiling eerily, one with skin and one only bones. She says "wow thanks that's horrifying, I'm not sleeping tonight." I fight with a girl that can project sprays of toxic glue from her hands and she thrashes me into submission.
At a school assembly talking with Reimu during a speech. She may have said something about hating buddhists, I was about to say "yeah, me too" when I get called out and asked I was talking about. I say in a purposely misleading way "I just wanted to tell Reimu three little words" which made her blush.
I had possessed Reimu and was asking her to apologise to Byakuren for me, maybe I had burned down her temple or something, Reimu asks "why?" like I'd done something good.
Smoked a hypnagogic phantom cigarette for the first time before dreaming about a dingy white-carpet hotel that I figured was a power spot because there was a lot of drug abuse going on there. I was in a dreamy haze as I accidently entered someone else's room on the wrong floor while naked, a beautiful girl comes in so I start excusing myself but then think maybe I've got a shot so I turn back to her and hold my arms out to show off but she says "leave" so I did. I'm descending some stairs when a girl hands me a high fantasy novel with a white dragon on the cover, I ask "is this dragon you?" She says yes before turning into it and attacking me but I refrained from fighting back since she was beautiful. I'm on one of the top floors when it turns into a Superjail! episode, a giant castle appears from afar with the Warden at its top and it topples over towards us, he disappears in a poof before the crash then reappears next to us afterwards. Someone complains about something being low brow while another, likely me, says "my unibrow is wasted upon you!" as I see him flinging an image from between his eyes into someone else's head. Some stuff happens with people flinging literal shit around so I leave in disgust. I hang out with a guy showing off cool gun tricks including him throwing a bullet at me and it managing to load into the magazine I had in my hand. He asks if my dad wasn't there for me, I said he was and that he was "good" to which he responds "ah yes, "good."" I'm in a room on the ground floor, someone brings in a middle age female therapist who sat with and tried to make me lower my guard, she had me pat a little white ferret which did ease me up a little. Seiga appeared at the door with a black cat that scratched at me. I leave the hotel and think over what's happened I think it's probably a dream so I tried jumping as high as I could until I realised it was. I returned to the building and outside the door Seiga and her now friendly cat fight the therapist with me, Seiga and her had lanterns burning with a strange pale scarlet flame that represented that they were exorcists. I killed the therapist's white cat before cornering her and telling her "why don't you...DIE", she reflects the death curse back at me, I reflect it back at her, she reflects it back then runs out of energy, I reflect it back which makes her vanish, leaving behind only a ornate white hand mirror. My hand wanders between a couple of scissor ordinary pink, exactly the ones I have in my actual room, and one ornate and white. Seiga seems to want me to pick the latter but I think of one dream where Izanami appeared in a pink kimono as I grab the pink scissor and stab the mirror into little fragments.
I found a black skeletal arm with sharp claws in a box "Flandre's Right Arm," its previous owner had been consumed by it somehow. When I took it it possessed my right arm and disappeared. My fist became always clenched tight, when I forcibly unclenched it a shadow of the black skeletal hand would appear behind mine, my right eye would become a devil's and I could destroy anything. There was a show where various Touhou characters did stuff, I was watching from a tree when a little boy spoke up to me and started making a confession. His heart was beating so hard I could see shockwaves of light emanating past me and I frozen under the pressure, it was really annoying that some boy was confessing to me and binding me like this so I unclenched my fist and was about to pop him when Seija comes to kicks the kid in the balls from behind. Later I'm having a long boss fight with a short professor in a mechsuit. He did a move where he ejects while sending it to self-destruct on me, I had a dream-this-before moment where I knew it didn't actually do damage so I didn't dodge, but instead it instakills me. Apparently he felt bad because he revives me with 33% health before calling some mechwolves to fight, but I was pissed off so I used Flandre's right arm to pop him. When I used it a little bit of the devil's right eye's pupil leaked over into my other eye and joined its pupil so I understood I couldn't use it too much.
I was with a sexy teacher, Seija came and flipped her skirt for me.
I was told I'm Seija in this picture.
With Tewi at a bamboo forest, she was looking and acting sexy.
I had a serene lap pillow with Okina.
I came to Yukari who was watching a movie, I laid on her lap and closed my eyes while listening to the movie. She said she wondered about the appreciation of art when a sense is missing, then started massaging my back.
With Yukari and Byakuren at an onsen, Byakuren without her sutra scroll didn't have the purple hair gradient so they looked identical.
At a gathering indoors, there was a large mural on the wall related to The Necronomicon, it had 500 black hand prints on it and mentioned a Touhou's birthday, I think Yukari and Byakuren's shared birthday.
I was with Yukari at an onsen with Doremy, Yukari said "if I didn't have you..." I thought "I'd probably have somebody else" like the Tim Minchin song, she mentions having learned that and mentions some other thing she recently learned, the implication being that she knows tons. I say "if I didn't have you" back to her then cozied up to Doremy to try and make her jealous.
I said to my mother that my love for Yukari is "true love."
With Yukari at a beach, there was a Bloodborne message on the ground that was an invitation to a party that had Bernkastel and Lambdadelta in it so I went to touch it though she cried not to just as I did. We were taken to the other end side of the beach, I was hugging Yukari from behind with my arms underneath her bosom, near us Lambda says "I'm so jealous..." of Yukari's large pair and my adoration for her.
Fell asleep while hearing the sweet whisper of a goddess alluring me, then dreamt I was in a beautiful onsen surrounded by cherry blossoms, I saw Youmu's phantom half at the other side so I went over, kissed and hugged it then said "Youmu, I love you"
Saw an artwork depicting Yukari as one of the Four Heavenly Kings, then saw a piece of shit saving it into a folder called "bitch." Then saw Youmu slashing the hell out of him while they were floating above a river but he wouldn't die, until I blew his brains out with a silver bullet.
In a courtroom with many powerful/important Touhous seated in a square of desks. Yukari was at the judge's podium and I was seated at a few desks put together in front of her as a scribe. There was a heavy atmosphere where it felt like we all wanted to laugh really badly but whoever did would be punished. Flan lets out a laugh, Yukari starts making her way around the desks, picks her up out of her seat walks around to a window(turns out we're high up in a skyscraper) then yanks out her wings and tosses her out. She then attaches the wings to her own back and does a cute charming prance which freeze frames mid-air to show off how beautiful she and the wings are.
In a hall with an old woman, I was saying there's going to be a life chapter review beyond the great door ahead of us while she doubted it. We went through then Hecatia appears and says "now begins your life chapter review" so I laugh "ha!" which makes Heca death stare me while walking over so I bow my head repeating "sorry" before waking up.
In France, trapped in a pocket dimension like a little human aquarium by Mergo along with maybe 20 or so other people that he liked. In the outside would it looked like a giant tooth shaped building. Either we escape or were let out, I was talking with a crowd of French people, the word "magic" made them laugh at you like you're a child while "hex" made them stare in dead silence. Me Yukari and many others were running an obstacle course made by Great Ones, one being a narrow passage with two rows of square spike traps with no way to tell which ones are trapped except there was tons of idiots running across leaving blood splatters. Yukari passed over the last row and jumped for joy on the other side, I didn't see which one she took so I asked her but she said she forgot, I stood on my hands while putting my feet to the otherside and standing up though I did drag my back across the trap a little, but I made it so I was so happy I slid down a nearby slope. Yukari told me to come back quickly along for the next obstacles, there were small square foot traps that spawn danmaku and I was pissed off at idiots triggering them.
Fought with Yuuka, she was scattering danmaku all around which didn't instakill but if you touched one all the rest quickly surged towards you. I used a 5 yen coin on a string, banging it on objects near her until she couldn't take it anymore, transformed into a black cat and hid amongst some rubble speaking like a gangsta saying something about "the 'hood."
The SDM had been abandoned since there had been a battle between Remi and Flan because there could only be one. Patchouli visits the ruins, makes her way to Remi's room silently staring over her bed for a moment before Flan kills her with a red X shaped slash to the neck.
In Irithyll, arguing with a guy over which one of us was the King of Irithyll, Yukari was nearby and was the actual King of Irithyll.
At Pontiff, looking at summon signs, I passed over an edgelord fellow then saw a "marriage white sign" left by Eirin so I summoned her, but before she arrived a few invading dragons shooting Lightning Arrow after rolls using bow glitch killed me.
At Pontiff, summoned as white phantom "Unipux" by Yukari, Flan invades us and hits me with R1-R1 with Profaned GS.
In a nice house, met Eirin sitting in a office chair, she empathised with me over losing sanity by living dependantly around idiots, I guess at the Lunar Capital. Outside the house was a emaciated guy in a cage of stone stalagmite/stalactites slumped over looking empty like he'd been there for eternities. I threw a pebble at him which instantly killed him. Back inside there was a boss fight against a couple of Great Ones, I fought one while a girl fought the other. Mine flew wildly around the room with a hit marker similarly flying about, the marker hit me in the forehead but I thought it'd be ok since even when it lands on you there's a very small chance to proc but then my brains exploded out of my forehead. I talked with the ghost of the girl who fought with me, she cried over the gruesome way she died so I said "come on. have a sense of humour." I speak to myself in one hallway "The Great Ones care not for love, justice, or petty hate, only survival." Talking with one of the Archdeacons along with a crowd, then had a bossfight in Rom's bossroom with him who had transformed into a Great One that looked like a OG DeS Shadow Lurker that attacked with slow fist slams but tracked so well you couldn't get behind him alone.
All the different Touhou factions were fighting around a flooded Irithyll, where the silver archers are. They each had an ultimate move though I only remember the Taoists summoning a flying boat that shot a lightning beam from the mouth of its dragon figurehead. Yukari slowly floated down in the midst of the chaos and said "peace is shit." She and I made our way around and up to Anor Londo, the place was flooded, being chased by a black guard dog for a bit but we flew and left it behind. The bridge between the rotating elevator and Anor Londo was gone, on the left side facing towards us was Drakeblood armour in Way of the Dragon pose. Yukari sat in that pose and tried to project an illusion of herself across the gap but there were trap switches along the way that triggered distracting illusions of Touhou characters, one being Suika bursting out laughing with a toss of her head making her horn impale Yukari's head which snapped her out of trance. After a few tries a male black dressed teacher appeared on the other side and told us off. Yukari gave up so we flew across, walking around but she was feeling down over failing. We see a strange boat that's submerged except for its mast passing by so I say "maybe it's a youkai boat?" which brings back her smile. She peers through black blinds in the windows of Anor Londo's cathedral where there's classes of black uniformed students, I tell her to stop saying if we're seen it'd be a turn off and that we should find somewhere to have sex.
I was with Yukari, I stuck myself inside her then realised a group of people were watching so I pulled out, then died fast as they threw knives at me. As a ghost I say "what the fuck? "have sex or die?""
Akyuu and I were dead. We were waiting for the assholes who organise the ferries across the sanzu to get our boat ready. They treated itinerants like shit, harassed the girls and dabbed us with red-orange dye. They gave us a shitty boat that barely held above the water, we make it to the other side where it was a Buddhist after-life skyscraper hotel. Non-sinners took a simple route to the top left and reincarnated while sinners took a convoluted route to the top right and were kept in hell. I went there along with some SDM characters, I saw Patchy and Koakuma lying in a big bed, cursed with morbid obesity. Junko comes and purifies our sins, we become uncursed and leave hell.
In a mall, Patchouli comes along and starts building a portal in front off me, like she's just showing off. It was a large, maybe 4m square, circuit with five elements and negative+positive poles. She arranged it until it was as symmetrical as she could get it, then charged it up. I went through and was spat out at another end of the mall. Junko was nearby, I went over calling her mother but tentatively as I wasn't sure if it was alright but I think she muttered something about whether I could handle her. I'm on a bus sitting at the backseat with Youmu, Reimu, Sanae. Youmu was giving me a lap pillow while the other two got annoyed since she kept getting excited which caused her phantom half to possess one of them.
I was told Junko was "holding back," which seemed to be a massive understatement of how she keeps her madness and fury in check.
At the Tengu's stronghold, I had been in a theatre with some tengu girls, we walked out and threw some coins on the sidewalk outside of it.
There was an oni warlord whose tengu friend chided him for always listening to his mind and never his heart. The oni got bored so he invaded the tengu stronghold, he fought in a large traditional japanese room, taking 5 or so tengu shinobi down before dying. I'm in hell, which looks kind of like a beach paradise. Hoozuki is there, Aya sees him and throws herself into his arms acting giddy and infatuated, babbling to herself for a little bit before he drops her on the ground and leaves.
I mistake a short black haired girl for Aya, she gets offended and calls Aya a whore. I say Aya is beautiful while white down feathers spurt out of nowhere onto the girls face like a cumshot until Aya stops in place in the air above her, says thanks to me, then vanishes.
Playing a game where if I left the roadside and entered the bush I'd encounter monster girls whereupon losing or winning against them would gain you monster girl parts. Okina and Aya were apart of the party, they each had two modes, Aya had normal mode: Master of the Wind, and joke mode: Yakumo Aya.
Sumireko dived down into a lake and interacted with a robotic giant squid which caused a change in the world. I was encountering people who had been transformed into robots though they looked normal outwardly.
I was walking along a dirt road with Sumireko and another long brown haired guy who was "literally Sumireko."
Sitting at a long table, there was annoying people to my left and some girls along with Sumireko to my right. I laid my head on the table facing right and said this way I get to see just beautiful girls which made Sumireko give a disgusted look.
I was at Sumireko's house where she lived alone, it was a good house that had a beautiful silence to it. I saw a room full of well-trained dogs sitting around quietly, a room with a bunch of blue cards with runes on them. We had got together over being listeners of Flady's Class Disruption.
Listening to class_01/class_02 while sleeping, I dreamt I made my way through obstacle and over a wooden palisade and found Yukari who was playing the beautiful piano part at the end of class_02, I pulled her sidelock back and gave her a kiss on the cheek.
I had dancing lessons with Patchouli as my teacher.
Read a manga where Yukari told me I was "blind."
Yukari and a guy were in front of a forest, he insults her so she impales him with her parasol then disappears through a gap. The viewpoint zooms through the forest as all the crows within caw and fly upwards, Yukari appears out of a gap in the sky with the guy still impaled, holds him up and unfurls the parasol, shredding him into a thousand pieces for the crows to eat.
Yukari was in the sky fighting with an eldritch god that looked like a giant black mass of tentacles eyes and mouths. It flung giant red crescent slashes that passed harmlessly over her barrier. He said, "well, if my stongest attack doesn't work..." then flung a tiny weak blue crescent that would instantly kill her with a papercut if it could sneak past her barrier, but it was also stopped, turning into droplets of blood upon hitting the barrier which fell down into a boat in the ocean with me and Yukari waiting. He turned into a Naruto-looking ninja with long black shorts with red flames on them and said "what is this, my bris?" Me and Yukari tilt our heads for a moment before I say "you mean a baptism?" he responds "whatever."
In a flooded Irithyll, I make my way top the top of a tall tower and watched Yukari luring a couple of gigantic demons around, there was two giant garbage hoppers floating in a river, she lured the demons close to them then opened a large gap which flushed both the demons and trash away. Then she appeared through a gap beside me, looking at over the city with me for a moment before disappearing.
I was with Udongein, a guy I hate was coming around so I wanted her to hide but she must've thought I wanted to meet with a girl behind her back because she started madly chanting "Jealous! Jealous! Jealous!..."
On top of the Water Reserve tower with a professor who sep up a garrote wire trap, then we waited as some guy came and got strangled by it. Afterwards he turned into a zombie and wandered down inside the tower and into where the ladder leading to Aldrich Faithful covenant is, though instead it was dark corridors slowly leading down. Me and the professor tried to follow, but we lost our way at a dark corner and came back out, he was thinking it was supernatural but I thought we were just confused. Somewhere else, a guy is having a panic attack, saying we must get The Key and reach The Gate. I said "calm down, nobody reached The Gate while having a panic attack, stupid" and he realised I was right. I looked at a board with the names of my pets, there was the name "Reisen Udongein Inaba MMMM MMMN MMNN MNNN NNNN" and other weird names so I thought "damn I have terrible naming sense. Else where, somebody was hiding, I went looking for him. In Gwynevere's chamber, I checked between her legs, then wondered if that was rude. She seemed to be asleep, but was just pretending, as she grabs me up in a hug.
Heard a remix of Alstroemeria's Shanghai Alice in 1884 that had droning distorted guitar instrumentals.
Heard a remix of Alstroemeria's PUNISHMENT that was subdued instrumentals and emphasised vocals that made me cry.
I flew around singing Alstroemeria's Shinto Shrine.
I saw Youmu walking around a forest, she proclaimed herself the strongest swordsman.
I saw a doujin series on sadpanda called "STRONGMAN NO YOUMU"
I was with Youmu, there was also a spirit of "Goddess Youmu" nearby who had ruffled hair, no headband and carried a golden bow. Youmu realised she had no panties on and there was a running gag where Youmu was 99% panties. She turned into a embarassed bumbling idiot while I led her over to a spinning blue icon of panties, a "Panty Station."
I flew with Youmu to resolve a incident. The feeling of flying was very nice, like surging forth with your soul. We hunkered down at a little slope like Japanese artificial riverbanks but only about as high as a person. Youmu used an assault rifle to pick off distance targets over the ramp while I shot people coming from the sides with a shotgun, the last guy I shot directly in the face a couple of times and instead of blowing his head off it was left covered in sepia-coloured ash and one of his eyes stuck out really far like a skinny little mountain. I laughed hard at this while Youmu passed by without a word, I thought my morbidity might've offended her so I said sorry but she replied "it's just your usual winter antics."
I was playing a JRPG with Youmu and another girl, we meet up in real life sitting at some folding chairs under cherry blossoms. Me and the girl were both jealous and annoyed we weren't alone with Youmu but behaved well in front her.
I was playing a Souls-like JRPG as Youmu, she had been on a long journey in a desert to complete a quest to hunt down a beast. Very low on health and without any food, she commented that there wasn't even a cactus in sight, but figured she could probably slay the beast and either take its food or eat it. It was supposed to be close by, but instead buzzing was heard as several swarms of giant hornets start coming at her. She sliced them up like Frayed Blade's swordspam WA and managed to kill them all. She only had a few hit points left afterwards and was about to die from the venom which I didn't want to see so I opened the menu and loaded back to a level 17 save made just before she entered the desert. Facing the desert, a gust of wind blows up the sand and an illusion of Havel appears saying "channel your strength," urging me to try again, but I think "fuck it" and quit the game.
Reality had become more corrupted, I saw an illusion of Youmu that walked around a grocery carpark during twilight before disappearing in the morning sun.
Someone had "poisoned" my drink with a massive dose of LSD. I was Dale Gribble, stumbling around thinking "damn, this is the fucking best" and saw an illusion of Reimu standing under a distant streetlamp.
The first time I slept with her, I saw my Yukari fumo in a little store offering me wares.
I was running on a desert battlefield with lines of droids fighting eachother, I threw my fumo Yukari really high up, ran past the robots then caught her afterwards. 2-D and Murdoc are nearby, one of them sees me, gets heart pupils in his eyes before running at me so I kick him over making him lie still. Then the exact same thing happens with the other.
I was stumbling along a beach at night dragging a Hiltless, which I thought meant I was ronin, through the sand. A kid walks along and just as he passes me I happen to stumble so he gets spooked and runs a little. I leave the beach to a nearby wooden kid's playground spiral tube, crawl my way through and at the top realise my Yukari fumo is extremely dirty so I think about getting her a bath.
I was in my bed but sitting upright with boots on and I had an extra Yukari fumo. I wondered if this might be a dream, then shrugged and snuggled with them.
I found and collected my Yukari fumo who was lost in a mall dawdling around acting senile and looking seriously weathered with age.
A car drives up to me, the dad driving it lowers his window and tosses out a couple of fumos while a kid in the backseat was crying and saying no. One of them was Patchy, I picked her off the ground and dusted her off.
Yukari was wearing a black tabard with the lower half split into three parts, a red sun at the top, white crescent moon in between and a blue star at the bottom.
In a VR building with a lot of people, I was flying around with Hecatia and her lampads singing together. There was a Fate servant dressed in black with a scythe who showed off a Noble Phantasm that used a lot of purple slashes with the scythe. She got close to me so Hecatia told her to back off, calling me her property. I checked a forum where the highest level poster was "Belial" with the title "Demon Summoner".
I had a litre juice box that was maybe an explosive in a fridge. A tengu girl was asking if it was mine so I said "yeah I know I'm not supposed to have this type of import," then Megumu came out with couple of others by her sides and said I hadn't earned my tokin hat yet so I'll be punished for this.
A couple of nice interactions with Megumu that I remember nothing about.
A collosal spirit of Miko was walking over the waters near a cliff side while ships of factions opposed to her were in the waters far below, bits of the end of Miko's cape getting torn up by their masts.
With Sakuya, I was interested in her silver stopwatch and couldn't help but eye it, she must have noticed since she went over to Remilia and decorated her collar with it. I complimented Remi saying "you look like a silver serpent! A silver serpent!" which made her happy. Somehow I got lured out to the end of a long pier, I thought about how I once lured someone out here and pushed them off when a Sumireko-lookalike girl who was my girlfriend pushed me off and laughed at me. She had an exact count of the times she got something over me saying something like 400-50 bragging about her overwhelming advantage. I ask "but will it ever be enough?" and she says "you're right."
There was a dark cave that had Junko inside.
I had fallen down a cliff and left a decent mark. Junko comes crashing down leaving a deep silhouette hole and then points out over the cliffs a bunch of other holes she had made throwing herself off so I said "yeah, I can't compete with that."
Near a large waterhole where there was a mystical obstacle course to be able to enter The Painted World, Clownpiece was there but she was lingering around because she was intimidated by the course. I was with some other guys telling off someone for making a shitty uncensor of Ke-ta's Clownpiece, saying he tainted her Navy Gem.
Rumia was at a dinner table with others, she had strange skin speckled like Brazillian Opal. She had the ability to mute sound like Luna, one of the women eating with her points out "you're doing it again!"
I was told Eiki's real ability was to manipulate darkness, which was being able to disappear and attack from any possible angle, down to an atomic level, exploiting any opening.
I entered a church and Joon was there, probably because of group hypnosis and taking people's money.
A house I was in was turned over on its side, Kisume with a whole well came crashing down after me though I narrowly avoid getting trapped under it. Then I pet her soft head so she got annoyed and disappeared along with her well.
I had a wall scroll of Keine.
At stands of a wrestling match. I saw Ringo, went over and offered her food. She said she had made some rules about fans feeding her since it happened a lot.
I went through an orange tunnel tent and saw Kagerou.
Every single Touhou was split up into two groups. I was on one side with Cirno in front of me and the F ginger witch behind me and I said "it's not fair! Their team has two Yuukas!"
Yuugi was my girlfriend, I visited her in hell, she was sitting sukhasana and tweaked her left nipple while looking at me.
Parsee was known as "the hottest on the beach", when I came across her she was so stunning I thought she was Yukari for a moment. She had a tubetop and a long rectangular loincloth patterned just like her regular clothes.
I visited Parsee at her apartment. Her floor was completely cluttered with clothes and whatnot. There were hand towels specifically for if you washed your hands then touched something dirty and needed to wash them again. She brushed my teeth which was nice but only lasted a minute and was hardly mindblowing like Nisemonogatari. A couple of guys from next door show up, Parsee gets fired up and says she wants to make her famous mash potatoes and sends one of them off to fetch potatoes while the other says "oh god we're fucked," dream ends with us all suffering food poisoning.
Watching something while Aya and Hatate are next to me, somewhat flustered I say "you're a bit close" and they respond by smiling and edging even closer.
Someone in a room full of monitors summoned an eldritch worm and tried to command it but it killed him. Yukari was there and said "none of my knights are jealous."
In a classroom with Yukari as teacher, she asks "what's more important, first kiss or last spurt" I said "both" to which she responds "that's the easy answer." There was a picture of her in space with a Haunter's face upon her parasol and indigo/violet stars around her with the text "Requiem for the Indigo and Violet"
In a classroom with Yukari, she was teaching us Japanese, I ask what it means a single vowel has a tenten.
In a classroom waiting for our teacher Yukari when a Mexican mustache substitute Yukari shows up.
In a classroom with Yukari and Okina sitting at my sides with their legs up on chairs.
With Yukari, Letty appears nearby with a swirl of frost, something about them both being seasonal youkai.
I climb up a broken wooden staircase to the side of a wooden monorail water channel and jump on a boat as it passes by. A tired looking Komachi was on it, the boat's hold was flooded and it sped quickly through the channel rocking back and forth. I said it must be hard to sleep and she laughed "sleep?"
Yukari told me "I love being awful."
I was in Gensokyo but no longer Yukari's pupil, she asked if I wanted her to be my master again and I just shuddered at the thought.
At a championship. Yukari sung the opening, a song praising the Gods and the Dragon, it was so bewitchingly beautiful it rang in my head for the rest of the dream. Participants had to clear two of three challenges to make it to the next stage. I was challenged to retrieve a food ball that was left near a dozing Guardian Ape holding a Black Knight Great Axe. I was crawling in a dim little temple near him when my eyes adjusted and I suddenly realised I was surrounded by monkeys. Though they weren't bothered by me I panicked, got up and started running. The monkeys made noise which alerted the ape who apparently chased me but I left the challenge zone. Someone asked me the definition of a champion, I said "someone that is a vessel for countless souls." I walked a wooden path with many signs pointing to different biomes that house different challenges. I talked with someone who mentioned a mountain in Japan that anyone would know, I asked "Fuji?" He said not that one, and that only a stupid idiot wouldn't know the one he was talking about. I say "is it Mt. Stupid Idiot?" then suddenly wake up as if I got kicked out of the dream, immediately trying to recall Yukari's song which was still ringing but felt it fade away like a meteorite burning up.
I was at a table with a not-so-pretty girl and playing chess with a dude. I'm bored so I get up and stand around for a bit before I see Hecatia enter the building. I follow her as she enters a room with rows of chairs and several people dressed as her. I also got to dress as her and was proud of it though her lowcut shirt was quite tight. I raced Daiyousei for the seat next to Hecatia, shes verbally calls it but I take the seat just before her so she gets mad, scorches my shirt with a flame and leaves. Hecatia magically fixes my clothes for me and the person at the front of the room says I have to sign in but Hecatia already signed me in as "Söeltaär" with a awesome looking demonic star illustrated beside it
At Gensokyo, at an X-mas party, unwrap a present and there's a really cool T-shirt. I'm happy as I look up to see Hecatia smiling at me from across the room.
I was told Kanako and her shimenawa represent a false ouroboros while Suwako and her mishaguji represent a true ouroboros. Kanako was getting flustered and acting like girlish and giddy around a prince who someone mentioned was like a figure of legend that lived in a great city on top of a mountain.
Suwako made a dubs post 66, while Sanae made a trips post 666. At a waterhole, me and many others clinging to the sides, during the rounds we wrestled with eachother but I was absurdly strong and drowned others easily. Then there was a fight with me, Diablo(from 3), King Ghidorah and other kaiju. I pointed out that other than me and Diablo they all had three heads and tails, one of them said "you're right, but so what?" and I shrugged. The battle began with them all fleeing from me, I grabbed Diablo by the head though I didn't use my whole strength since I didn't want to underestimate him nor show my full power yet, dragged him around for a bit then realised I accidently crushed his skull. There was a Dark Souls like white whisp on his head so I picked it up, "Soul of Diablo". In the paddock nearby "Cthulu, the Crawling Chaos" appears, a train with a spooky face. I treated it as a Great One and prostrated, its mouth opened and it ran over me. I passed through 4 or 5 carriages, one had a bunch of paintbuckets and brushes hanging from the ceiling which dripped some drops on me, one had dangling electrical wires that gave me a few stings, forgot the others but maybe one with books. After it fulled passed over me I thought it was just a mindless object perhaps being pushed around by a cosmic Yukari like a toy.
Yukari was possessed by Baal who looked like a standard red devil visible alongside her, we fucked so hard she tried to stand up afterwards but her legs buckled.
Several red dragons raging at a property ahead of me, I see Reimu coming up the road beside me passing a fire hydrant and we were probably going to take on the dragons.
In a massive amusement centre with its own landscapes. I had "journeyed north" and brought back a lemur that was the last of its kind, I showed it off to some scientists but their lab caught on fire so I left. Hanging around some hills where uphill white people were insulting downhill black people and their music. I go back north to return the lemur, coming to a warehouse that had an empty panel up in the center of its roof. I climbed up close to it and the lemur went up first, coming back down with scales and feathers and harassing me, until I ignored it and started going up to the panel myself which made it try to stop me like it was afraid. I went up beyond and the lemur tentatively reached out its hand and managed to retract in time before a giant scaled chicken, too big to come back through, pecked at it through the hole with an orchestral sting. I'm back to normal, I fuck around with some guy driving an earth mover for a bit, go into a little building with comedic stuff for a bit, then go to leave the centre, though I see an employee's only door that I figure I might as well trespass in since I wasn't coming back. It's a computer lab but with view masters that had class photos of all the centre's creators but they had a really weird atmosphere about them, someone came in and told me to leave. I fly along roads wanting to go up higher but there were so many power cables I couldn't seem to do so. I come to a beach with artificial waves and see some pretty girls but their boyfriends show up so I lose interest. The beach starts to close so I make a sea monster appear to try and get peoples attention back for a moment. I fly off to sea so I can fly higher though giant sawtooth gates try to close over me, but I make it through. I fly around sublimely beautiful countrysides with sunshowers and willow trees. I fly around a city, at one point talk to a dude saying it's important to have an ursuer, someone to always pursue. He said his ursuer was me so I said come on dude, my ursuer is Yukari, can't you find a girl to chase after? I fly through the city aimlessly looking for Yukari. I was actually possessing a vampire called Mr. Manhattan, I kept looking, unprepared when dawn came. Everything was looked like a dull orange colour to my hypersensitive eyes as I stumbled around trying to hide in a courtyard, but feds arrested me so I unpossessed the vamp. One of the cops sees me and says hey doesn't that look like the guy we just arrested but since they were already carrying him off they ignored him. A gang of vampires confronts me later so I apologise about getting their friend fucked over, one of them tells me to suck the dick of their representative that was talking to me but he said it was alright "I never cared for dick sucking." I said since they were experimenting on the captive vampire they'd better be on their toes now, one of them replies "we can tiptoe sprint on tightropes with our eyes closed." I go off to continue looking for Yukari, cops led by one big mechazawa-like robot try to catch me using circular electric fields but I figure out how to teleport by facing away from where I want to go, closing my eyes and imagining teleporting back there. I keep teleporting to some mountains and enter a train station called "Gate Lock & Key." I'm waiting for my train when a guy comes and orders his ticket but in a sing-song voice just like Flandre's theme, someone says "go back to Touhou" then everyone at the station but me laughs at him. The train shows up, driving over shallow waters towards beautiful islands of green and purple cherry blossoms and further off mountains. Everyone in the train wants to catch me so I'm shapeshifting into different train parts that they always somehow found their way to, until close enough to the cherry blossom islands for me to leave off. People in construction worker jackets chased me so I teleported away until I reached the mountains. A giant Venus is reclining upon the mountains, I walk up her until I reach her breasts, she says "I'll thank you not to have sex with my breasts" but her saying that made me unable not to do so. As I cum she rears up and her hair turns into purple tentacles, but she's not really that angry. I become a scylla witch, working with her and other witches for a long time until one day I happen to stick my finger into a little green pot that makes a gross squelch noise and turns it purple. Venus says that sound was disgusting so she's going to sacrifice me. I beg her not to, and show that the pot turned back green, but she says she wont stop since I'll be "too delicious." She flies me upwards along rows of mountains until we reach Aza-Tot, Star-Seat-Door of Death, which looked like a large wooden torture device, with a center that had right hands overlapping with eachother ringed around it, in the center and in each palm was a protagonist who had been sacrificed, trapped waist deep and writhing in agony, the center had a beautiful maiden who was especially delicious because she was so innocent, and I remember one of the hands had a viking looking fellow. Venus was about to sacrifice me when I pull out a little music box I had used once before that serves as a universal distraction, playing some really dumb sounding old-timey song, that had even the agonised sacrifices staring in a daze for a while. I flew off up past another row of mountains and come across three chests, I turn my right index finger into a silver key and hide inside the silver chest. Venus comes and tells me to get out of there before all of the friends I had made along the way show up and tell her off. Turns out it was all a Lovecraft book that was made into a movie, and I had a knock-off name similar to Randolph Carter.
At a party, Koishi's hat was hanging on a little white post, Ran was cosplaying as a nurse and jumped around while I jumped after her letting out an "aiya!" with each jump. Talking to someone, I say Touhou is sacred, I'm not afraid of new young fans but shitty older people.
Post a reply to something on Twitter saying something like "retarded secondaries masturbating to my wife."
At a rich girl's house, Ran asks me a question to which I answer "study" and she says correct, never enough time in the world for study. Riding train carriages when Uboa appears along with a bunch of boxes/clutter and red/blue/yellow/green kanji appearing all over the place.
Encounter 3 other Flandre players in Ds3, we were all using a gesture so I took a screenshot, in the couple of seconds it took for me to return from the share screen the fuckers killed me.
Bought the Phat! Yukari figure at a mall. In another part of the mall a heavy metal band had been summoned from a higher dimension, they were extremely weird and spooky such that I wouldn't go near them though I expected great things.
Walking through a dimly lit stone temple, talking to someone saying Yukari's like my wife. There was a smug little stone statue of the jimmies gorilla. I pass through the place again after it was left to darkness for a very long time and the gorilla had a harrowed expression, being touched by the abyss having lessened its smugness considerably.
Asked Yukari about the Souls decision of letting the world fade into darkness and whether it was a good idea, she replied "warmth is precious."
Yukari had a Dota 2 hero bound in place and had Lifestealer with enough minus attack items so he dealt no damage auto-attacking it non-stop.
Playing Ds3, I could buff my Exile GS with jealousy for 10% extra AR.
Playing Ds3 but it was like Wc3 custom games, someone used cone frost which nearly killed me after just a half-second of exposure. Follow a guy dropping armour pieces but the asshole in front of me kept picking them all up, eventually he leaves one and I get a Helm of Immolation. I was Death Knight Arthas with the skills Immolation(79 dps), Vampriric Aura and Stampede with DKA icon that made Death Knights charge in a circular fractal pattern. My other three slots were taken up by pictures of Yukari that served as jealousy stat boosts.
Yukari was watching me play a Wc3 hero tower defense, I accidently pick one option and repick, there were 5 different heros that all seemed to be lich kings, I picked Abyssal Kael'thas, his model was normal but he had a custom icon of him wearing Helm of Domination with glowing green eyes which Yukari said "nice fanart" about. All my skills were green coloured, for my first skill I could pick mirror image or 250% attack speed so I chose the latter.
I had been running along a road for a while, entered a party house where I saw Cirno who smiled a nice big dumb happy smile like :D at me.
Playing a "game", I said the "graphics" were immensely beautiful. Made my way around a verdant green swamp with reflective waters, went along a secret pathway of stepping stones, then long partially submerged ridges that I edged along like a man on a spanish donkey, until I reached close to a place where Yukari had been waiting on a little circular island. She wasn't there when I came, just violet flowers in her place. Nearby I saw some discarded underwear from someone who had disappeared into Gensokyo from here. I found a sketchbook that was mostly empty but one page had a message directed towards the person who abandoned reality saying "it was the DMs wasn't it?"
I woke up with Ds3 player Zeus LE DIEU in my kitchen, he had made me french toast on a little plate so I said "oh, how fancy, I'm going to eat this at a table like a well-mannered person." Him and another guy were laughing about something so I asked them to repeat for me but I didn't really hear it again, until he called my white fluffy cat "Jizz" which made me laugh. He was teasing it until it adapted to what he was doing somehow since he said "oh kitty, you're so quick to git gud!" I asked if he clipped the fight where I glitched soul dregs at him while he was coming after me because his blood thirsty saltiness, my unnatural movements, and us both being dark spirits made the fight feel very dark which went perfectly with the song I had been listening to, ﾑﾁﾑﾁﾀﾞｰ
At the SDM library, Koakuma asked if I wanted to be raped by monsters so I replied "no" of course, she then put a Christian rosary around my neck which, to my irritation, I couldn't take off. Then I was at Irithyll, I had a little Jesus face under my stamina bar and my dung pies were turned into miniature Wrath of the Gods.
I made my way around a Game of Life boardgame of sorts when I reached a point where I couldn't progress without praising Jesus. I said fuck that and started retracing my steps when Flandre said I was like her, negative.
I had been working for a huge shopping centre complex, I was a golden haired Super Sakuya. The place closed down so I was invited by the owner to have some cereal as a farewell party. I said sure, as long as it isn't homogenised pasteurised horseshit milk, he said they had some but it was in this one big glass tank of self-stirring cereal like a popcorn tank at the cinemas, which was pretty gross looking. I walk with Flan out to a place where Remilia and others had prepared graves for themselves. Remi's grave had a golden kikestick on it which disgusted me, I asked Flan "why the hell does a vampire have that on its grave?"
I impregnated Hecatia normally then impregnated both of her armpits.
I was coming buckets all over Sanae until she was completely covered, then pressed myself deep inside up against her cervix for the finish.
Had a foursome with very thicc Yukari, Yuuka and Reimu.
I was jilling Yukari while enemies were coming at us, she had a purple energy explosive orgasm that killed them.
Watching a video someone made, Kasen and Battler at the bottom of a hill vs Yukari at the top. Kasen and Battler did a team attack where she threw him at Yukari and he endless 9 punched her in the face. Yukari got very flustered, ran off and dropped herself waist deep in a hole while a gigantic black centipede was summoned, burrowed underground and fucked her from beneath to power her up.
On Twitter, skrmnana dm'd me a video where she verbally abused me with a vpuppet of Yukari.
I was with Hecatia, Zeus was around and I had his miracle "Sunlight Spear" equipped. Hecatia had made a bunch of delicious eclairs, me and another guy fought over eating them. I wanted to bring Hecatia a chocolate bar as a present, she said she had 15 favourites. I told her not to list them because she'd wake up my brain's left-hemisphere, but to tell me in song. She sang but I only remember the line "the goddess's pastries are sexy."
I was sitting next to Aya, a small crowd comes to me asking about one dream I had. I recount that an abrahamic prophet was told all he knew by a tengu hiding in a tree, one of them didn't hear me so I repeated myself. Aya had been talking to someone else and asked what I was talking about so I repeated myself again, getting exasperated. Demolition D comes to me and hands over $80, I say "you know I'm just gonna spend this on drugs, right?" to which he shrugs.
Playing Dark Souls MMORPG. Playing as Flandre Scarlet using Profaned GS and Irithyll rapier, every weapon in the game had an expansive moveset, I killed someone by stabbing through him deep into the ground. I used Great Heal which brought up tons of little numbers like health recovered, exp gained, healing mastery increased. It leveled me up so I went through a skill mastery tree for thrust weapons, picking a flat damage boost. There were also thrust counter damage bonus increase option with Leo ring icon and another that inflicted frost build-up and flat bonus damage on counter hits with a Irithyll rapier icon. The skill tree was very long and the scaling was absurdly high towards the end, like 3346% increased thrust damage. Moving between areas like Monster Hunter, when a character named after a Touhou character got invaded by another TOUHOU VERSUS TOUHOU popped up. I was disappointed as this happened to me just as I died in Farron swamp to tough enemies that were partly-invisible like Irithyll's slaves. I look up on a map where Koishi and another Touhou were playing and fast travel over to play together.
Saw Youmu at Pontiff arena, she was a Dusk cosplayer.
Using Rakuyo, I fought against a hooded player using Reiterpallash. During the fight I noticed she would stay back when I used R2 so I always did the uncharged twirl. She won and I could see it was Youmu under the hood so I thought "no wonder she respected the charge attack."
Beside a lake, Sanae was doing a ritual dance, spinning around me with the snake in her hair waving about.
Remilia had taken over a necropolis in South Asia, she was brought an insane amount of human sacrifices such that her bloody excrement overflowed out of her down over the pyramid below her. In a castle, she was talking with a guy who had the gall to say something disrespecting her under his breath, she threw Gungnir just past his head which was so powerful the shockwaves of energy it created while flying tore up a deep ravine as it ringed the Earth near the equator, returning to her hand from behind.
Flan was walking around with a pulsing aura like her soul was overflowing from its vessel. I talk with Remilia who looks normal and ask her about Flan, she say its because Flan's had lots of sex while she's a virgin, so I took her off to pop her cherry.
I was in hell with Mai and Satono. There were burning crosses everywhere, the heat was killing me but the dancers were fine. I did a dance by one of the crosses and they say "you call that a memorial dance?" Leave hell through a door that had Okina on it or perhaps around nearby. Running along a road from others escaping from a wave of death, I just start phasing through walls to escape, eventually getting stuck but realising it's just a movie before the wave hits me. Walking around snowy Russian streets, I come across Jontron but acting like a grizzled bum mentor, he says gruffly "you've got dreams, kid."
Walking through a mall, saw some people using magichange weapons, and one guy that summoned a shadow of oni Kasen, just like the one Mamizou imagined(this was before she was revealed), who attacked with a flurry of claw swipes. I left the mall and in a fast food restaurant parking lot have a DBZ-tier showdown with a fat guy for the title of King of Cats. I defeat him and claim the regalia, a shortsword shaped like a fish. Later I'm suffering from piles, I see loli Shinobu nearby and wave my sword at her, she comes with me into a bathroom to lick my bloody ass while people who saw me enter a bathroom with a little girl annoyingly try to peer in.
I got on a bus and Sumireko sits next to me saying "hey, I'll be your friend." I barely contain a laugh because she had a thick American accent, having learned English there, so she gets flustered and tells me not to laugh.
Yukari had a Red/Blue Tearstone loadout that was 666, and a Llyod's Sword/Shield loadout that was 777.
I was told Dragonslayer Armour + Blindfold mask + Lothric Warbanner + Black Flame is Okina's loadout.
I was character cosplaying Okina in a future Souls game. I used a white tabard with black calligraphy and green pants for the look. I fought with someone on a very tall tower like Feel Good Inc., we both accidently fell off but I alone managed to fall back in through an opening like the Feel Good Inc.'s window.
Yukari and I apprehended someone, I bent their umbrella out of shape while Yukari questions him "is that a nen weapon?" which makes me go "heh" which makes her go "heh."
At Yakumo household, Yukari's watching as Ran tries to get me to do something but I was upset, I throw myself on a bed and hide under the blankets, Ran calls me childish so I say "you wanna see childish? Bother me anymore and I'll cry!" Which makes Yukari go "heh." They programmed me, Ran would hold me head on her lap with her head to mine and I saw a psychic ripple. Yukari had me lay face down on a bed, she came over and nuzzled into the back of my neck, possessing me. We said "Yes...Hahaha...What...?"
At a bar, I see Yukari on a stool, sit next to her and she calls me "overnourished."
Walking with a Ds3 player at mall, I spied some Ran pictures on his phone but he seemed to hate me.
Chen popped out of a gap with a cheeky grin after having pranked me and someone else somehow.
I was depressed over not being with my family and Chen says "it's ok, they're right over there," pointing at Yukari and Ran sitting at a nearby bar except looking like childish drawings.
There was a third person view of myself and it was said about me that I just want to be with my family.
In America, I see Yukari walking with government officials, I try to talk to her but she wouldn't even speak to me.
In a classroom with Yukari teaching us with a powerpoint, there was a keyboard blocking a tiny sliver of the bottom of the projection, a guy who's irritated by it puts his hand up but she dismisses him just saying "bitch." I think "what a mean awesome teacher."
Someone asked Yukari a question about something and she seemed to geniunely advise him to kill himself. I wanted to ask Yukari how to go to another world but coveninetly someone stole her attention just before I asked.
Reimu was in a Souls game, dual wielding fern leaves like PCB's title screen. They were light curved swords with close to zero weight and extra critical damage, she parried and riposted someone with them.
Flying through the sky fighting with Ryujin, he attacked fiercely from here and there, forming his body out of clouds, looking like a massive lung dragon. There was also an Earth dragon, but it was dead, looking like a giant buried fossil of a Western dragon.
I wondered if Ryujin was the equivalent of a montheistic god.
Interacting with a dark skinned ghost girl I wanted to buy owned by a soul trader guy who had a lot of ghosts around his house. He died so I asked "can I have his souls?" but he got better or something. There was ramp leading into the sea nearby, I rang a bell and a dozen or so of Ryujin's mermaid daughters were sumoned, making their way around the party interacting with some of the guys before returning to sea. I rang the bell again expecting a single exceptionally beautiful white mermaid but instead a water-coloured aluminum foil being like Leliel's shadow came forth, scooped me up and carried me about while I felt powerful indescrible feelings. I was turned off by the idea of a water/foil girlfriend though and she seemed to think the same because she dropped me and picked up a sheet of aluminum foil before returning to sea. I didn't ring the bell again since I figurd it summoned from a higher dimension each time. I was in service to Ryujin and hailed him by holding aloft a Lothric Warbanner, a gigantic Warbanner was held out of the sea in response.
Okina and another girl were mermaids, one of them had slightly curled fins while the other had straight ones, one could swim in an automatic way while the other had to control their movement.
Someone was raising a child, they had life-reviews for him every year or so. I thought back on the retarded way I was raised and it brought to mind Alstroermeria's Leapt Through Time "変わりはいくらでもいる虚しさに気付かされた"
I was stealing cars so I could hack together a dream car for my talking cat. At a gas station my cat keeps talking shit at Mad Dog Azrael nearby who gets pissed off so I have to fight him while Alstroemeria's Lost Emotion started playing.
was riding around with other drug users when we got pulled over by cops. We were taken to a classroom where a girl with 5 big black moles on her forehead was instructing us, a girl at the back said we shouldn't listen because she's evil while I was annoyed since I couldn't hear from where I was. She comes to me, saying I'm special, I can do anything, and kisses my foot, I leave the building and fly up red brick buildings while crows flew about and MANIACAL DEGREE played. Reaching the top of one, I fly towards the sun as something tells me I can have an eternal dream as long as I follow it. I keep following a cord connected to the sun, flying over different landscapes until it sets, I figure I can do the same but with the moon but it wasn't around so I returned to the surface. In a jungle, come across a tribe, I steal a bell that when rung causes dissonance in nearby souls that dematerialises them, I wipe out the tribe with it, leaving one purple haired ferrywoman. She ferries me across a lake where I come across another tribe, and after a bit kill them with the bell too, though one meditation expert required another ring since he managed to stabilise himself. The purple haired girl, who was probably Izanami, died too and turned into a purple gem, Yasakani no Magatama. I was suddenly watching myself third person, I was Izanagi and I said "with this I can see that if I gather all three I'll only have a tiny fraction of the power I would obtain from destroying the planet...but then there'd be no internet", making me and another girl nearby laugh. I acquire a guitar and another thing that were sacred treasures and put them together into a staff that had a status showing off many different properties, one was being able to materialise bananas. Then I went and lorded above a busy freeway intersection.
Become lucid in one dream, try to follow a cord connected to the sun again but end up in some matrix behind the curtain place with hostiles, I summon the stake Leviathan and tell her to kill them for me, but she says to ask in a more polite manner, I do so and she flies around as a stake killing them all. I meet with a guy with grimoire on devils nearby, it had Belial and Vlad Dracula in it, I ask if he had the Scarlet sisters and he indeed had a little half-page devoted to them, saying they were quite odd. I tell him I want to meet Dracula so we do a little ritual, he asks me to pick some traits so I pick "The Beast" which had an icon of a transformed hunter mob as he cries “no!” before turning into a beast himself. Dracula’s castle appears and I dive into its reflection. Avoiding hordes of transformed beasts, I come across a Jesus statue that makes them kill themselves through their own belief “I’m a beast, so I die before this statue.” I hang around it for a bit but since I don’t like him leave off, drop off the side of the castle and sink to its peak. I meet Dracula and he asks what I want, I say I want to be an antagonist mentor that teases D and helps him grow while getting off scot free and he agrees to it.
Saw an image of reality with golden light radiating out of it and above into an image of fantasy while TIMELESS ROMANCE played.
Saw a picture of Yuuka, either she had a green rose for a head and thorny red roots for a dress or a green seed for a head and red roses for a dress.
A group of gray giant cubes appeared all around the kappa’s waterfall. Nitori came crying to me saying I had to sacrifice myself or all the kappa would die. I wasn’t up for it and asked Yukari next to me who seemed to know another way.
Saw a GIF of Moses on top of a mountain holding up a chocolate bar tablet waving it back and forth with God in the clouds behind him, I false awakened with a bunch of chocolate bars around me.
I followed Hecatia to a beach along with an apprehensive looking Yukari, I took the latter in my arms and started floating along since I wanted to practice being a gap youkai that skirts floors and doors.
In a school, I said that /jp/’s moderation was shit and that only one or two of them actually care about Touhou and the rest were fucking faggots. Someone calls up a classroom and tells a mod what I said and asks if they were mad, he goes “heh” while him and one other were standing while the rest of them cowered under their desks. I had a girl scoop me up in her arms, she ran out into the oval really fast then took flight high into the sky, passing through barriers of clouds until she broke through into Gensokyo.
I was playing Bloodborne 2 which had horrifyingly improved chalice dungeons. I was running to a boss fog while chased by a bunch of madmen, they caught me just before I could traverse, took me off to a lab and implanted pussies all over me. A person by my side watching me play was disgusted at how far the developers went, but I just patiently waited until they dumped me back at the fog door. I enter into the Hunter’s Dream arena with Moon Presence, before we even hit eachother a blue masterspark rockets out of my body leaving the boss with less than 10% health.
Yukari and I leave a sex toy store and get chased by a couple of crazy christians. We manage to lose them, at one point Yukari and I agreed that genesis is bullshit.
I had sex with Kaguya’s sister, Chao Feng perhaps, at a hospital that was probably Eientei. I’m sitting with a girl that acts as a vessel for Yukari on my lap, she calls me a slut and other stuff and says she has cancer in her vagina and other stuff, I say hey, ignoring what others think, we’re really cool.
I was chased around by Yukari and Reimu, both representing infinity, ∞ and 0.
Someone was fighting Yukari in Sekiro, most hits were missing her and she said it’s unintiutive but you have to aim for the sukima.
Kaguya was going around on dates with prospective partners, I couldn’t help but follow her around, practically stalking her as I watched from a bridge high above as she went on a date with a guy in a forest. There was a guy on the bridge also watching them, telling the guy what to say. He told me he was just trying to get close to Kaguya so he could use her power to make the moon turn crimson. Kaguya returns from her date, I can’t help but escort her all the way onto her bus home and she parts by saying I had basically been another one of her dates.
Make my way to a mountain top and have a fight with a guy with Helm of Favor and Armour of Thorns using Frayed Blade. Walking around near a market, someone tells me to beware the gypsies. I come to Yukari with Yoda nearby, who had just returned from a battle simulation and was meditating. I say to him “I don’t like you or your franchise, but gimme advice” he replies “clean your room, change your habits.” Go to a class with Yukari where she instructed us stuff to bring out our potential, saying to jump as high as we can, for the King. I have Avelyn which had 3 sets of triple crossbows, normal shots use the center three with the WA being to fire all of them at once, use it to instakill someone turning them into a pincushion. Walking through a mall that had TVs with pro-gun propagranda but with negatives laced among the words making it anti-gun brainwash, along with a jazzy song playing in the mall repeating “can’t resist the brainwashing baby~” I shoot down some TVs and speakers out of irritation. There’s a couple of bio-enhanced soldiers, the mentally weaker of the two says he doesn’t know about guns anymore and the other one says you’ve been brainwashed. The weak one undoes some bio enhancements on his body and the other one dies in the process of trying to save him. Make my way to Yukari again and she tells me about the King she serves, a dark dragon that lives underground. There was also another cthonic dragon that was a catoblepas, but it was dead. She shows me crests for the two of them. https://files.catbox.moe/8dh20x.jpg I’m in Irithyll fighting inside the Water Reserve tower, the guy I’m fighting falls down the hole to the Reserve while I stay far away from it, yet still somehow end up suddenly falling down it and get consumed by the King which feeds itself on Human Dregs.
In a store, there was a government placed wi-fi noise that was directed at a problematic individual trying to give them cancer. I mention to someone that the only thing I want to do is make Yukari happy.
In a classroom with Yuuka, I throw scrunched up paper ball at the wall really hard, it ricocheted around the room before landing in a bin, but she wasn’t impressed.
Chimata on a train surrounded by people, she gave me a card that was apparently OP, a werewolf card that had no cooldown but dealt massive damage if you took a hit, or something. I wondered why it was a Yu-gi-oh! card though and showed it back to her, but that turned it into a blank card.
Sakuya was raped up in the sky under the moon in a way that paralleled Miska Drake’s rape. I was told Alstroemeria’s Spotless was a requiem made for a lover who died whilst away in a foreign land.
Stuck Chaos into a guy who was possessed by the Eternity demon from Chainsaw Man, a gap in his torso leading into cosmic space. I pulled out the sword with great effort which killed the demon and powered up Chaos, giving him a longer thicker blade with dragonic scutes, though his eyes were rolled upwards like the power up was too much so I wondered how to turn him back.
With Rance, he had found a wooden idol puzzle which I took off him saying I’d solve it and give him the girl inside which I did, making him very happy.
Demons took my soul, shaped like a peach slice, and threw it out over lava. It bounced high up off the lava with a vent of steam coming out while all kinds of demons bounded from the walls after it. A cat with a pink bracelet that made me think “yes! super pink!” took and ate it, then I turned into black knight with bright pink bits on its armour, like one of the Schachmatt. Am Isuel came at me all excited, saying “yay! same colours!”
Hanging out with a few guys that had Rance bodyspray with a cool picture of him on the can.
Satori said to me “I can hear all your inhuman thoughts” which I thought meant my monstrous subconscious thoughts rather than the ones I could hear myself. She had me listen to a song she made that had many layers and voices that gave me strong frissons.
With Yukari in a classroom, she was drawing “artificial wombs” on pieces of paper. She asked for my glittery blue pen saying it was a pretty colour, then scribbled up the insides of the wombs with it and folded them up into shape. I accidently knocked one off a desk and amniotic fluid spilled out but she didn’t seem to care. She asked me to shop for some stuff, she maybe asked for Ranch sauce but since it was a dream I didn’t understand her well “Rance sauce?” I asked, making her laugh. I said I geniunely didn’t hear her though, did you say Ranch sauce? She repeated the list then I asked again what she said, making her lose her humor and vanish through a gap. There was a guy in the room at a desk among others who said something insulting about her, so I went over and flipped his desk on him, which made him say I have a virgin complex.
Marisa was caught doing something so I was asked to punish her. I just stuck my dick inside her for a moment then pulled out. She had no reaction for several moments then got really flustered, took to her broom and flew off.
Remilia told me the only thing to fear is the fear of the fear of the fear.
I was told Youmu’s colour is yellow, because she’s a coward, but her fear gives her great strength.
I was with Yukari, a snake god possessed a man nearby, he then stared at Yukari intensely until she said “I’m not afraid of you.” He stared for a moment longer then walked off in a way strangely like slithering, while Yukari breathed a sigh of relief and said she nearly lost her life.
I had returned to life a thousand years after my death. People were using my dream scroll as a regalia, I killed someone with it and took it back. A bunch of sealed away witches were released, flying around in chaos. One of them, “La Pucelle,” fought with me. I was winning until she grabbed me and pulled us both into a Fusion Booth, I said “I admire your insanity” before we fused. I became her left arm, my spirit following behind her like a stand.
In a classroom, there were several Sons of Yahweh acting like they were living Touhou characters, which pissed me off. I called them fakes and said I was the only one, then thought about killing them all when one of them comes to me and says “hey, I hate my father.” I could create omnipotent chi balls, since I’m “Unipux.” This power required the presence of twin little girls. 6 or so years before this dream, I had a Vision of being chased down by shadowy hunters that rose up barbed wire fences to stop me, I leaped over them but eventually was caught upon one, just as they were upon me a girl appeared at my side and relays the image of a hand with “Unipux” over it, making reality reset and the hunters, which were just my fear and ego, disappear. I was told Unipux means “one who can do anything.” Had a crown, a guy who was serving me and helping me charge up chi balls was pissed that I wouldn’t change him into a woman, I said just because I have a good hat doesn’t mean I’m a good lord. At a gathering, Yukari is there and a beautiful jazz song in the background repeats “eternal love~” as she grabs hold of me and flies us off. The song stays with us as she tells me not to worry, that she has everything planned out until our eternity together, and I see Makima associated with her.
There was a couple of guys who took LSD and watched a huntsman spider undergo a moult.
Yukari told me my spirit was going to change to an Eagle’s soon.
Saw art by chiroru of me and Yukari flying through the sky together, though he seemed to hate me.
Gray aliens were trying to kidnap Kaguya so I screamed at them so hard they died.
In a room, on the wall was four Dragon Tooths arranged interlocking up-down-up-down. In the living room, eating at a table with others, I see Koishi over in the corner of the room being ignored so I went over to her. She asks me to say “bururururun!” so I tried it and she said “nooo! Higher in your throat!” I tried again but she lost attention, went over to the table I was at, grabbed a guy’s bowl of spaghetti, opened wide, and started pouring it down the hatch.
There was a child Aya, her parents were strict and made her train all day every day. She had just put on a performance, afterwards me and some other friends gave her some much needed congratulations so she was happy, but soon her parents show up to drag her off. She looked at me with a sad expression and on the wooden table below me I saw her eyes and sad frown like puddles of tears that made me cry. Before she was totally dragged off I see she was wearing shorts so I said “wait a second, Aya, you’re a boy?” he replies “yes” so I yell “noooo!” Then dream I’m on a little hill, I see regular Aya walking with other tengu girls so I call out to her “Aya! Your pants!” She lifts her skirt showing off panties in reply then started walking over but the other tengu girls swarmed over me.
Keiichi was in a class with the other club members. They were trying to force something upon him that he wasn’t going to take, one of them turned into Udon and forced him into taking it, in his vision they all turned into Udon with blood moons in their eyes.
In my bed with Dog Fashion Disco’s 100 Suicide stuck in my head, I was trying to coming up with alternative lyrics about being dragged around the Universe in dreams, when the whole world starts wildly swaying side to side. I went over to my Yukari figure but it had fallen apart, I took pieces with it and ate them as I checked outside but the sway had stopped, the adult tree in my backyard replaced by a sapling.
Saw Yukari go into a bathroom with another guy right in front of me.
Saw Yukari with a demonic mace crush me with a single blow that turned me into little red orbs like DMC which was absorbed by the mace. I’m in Irithyll, there’s red lycoris everywhere and Eiki nearby. In some public building, Yukari comes to me with heart pupils in her eyes saying “oh, I can’t help it, I’m a witch.” Then I take her off to a bathroom to fuck.
Saw a guy atop the Water Reserve tower toss Yukari into a pocket dimension of empty tatami mat rooms to suffer alone without having sex, for having cheated.
There was a faggot who drank christ’s blood going around raping Touhous, he wanted Yukari. I wake her up and tell her and she says “why not just let him?” I tell her to go back to sleep and challenge him to a duel. We made fighting equipment out of kitchen utensils, then when the fight began I instantly killed him with my makeshift rapier. Since it was unsatisfying I brought him back to life but the result was exactly the same.
In a courtroom, I cast a seal of Satan on Yukari to prevent her cheating.
Yukari told me one day I can make her all mine alone, while there was a large full moon in the sky behind her.
I was given a red orb and told to make a legion, and that Yukari had a black crystal legion. Come across Yukari and ask her for advice for my waking self but she stayed silent. After exchanging some words she calls me Satan, I chase after her, repeatedly fucking her before she would slip off and run some more. Eventually she casts the curse of “The Hero and the White Snake” on me, making me lose myself in a dreamy haze when fucking her, so it was easier to escape from me. I found it hard to move fast in the dream, picking up a broom I could fly fast. Several Ancient Dragons were bringing catastrophe, looking similar to the Black Beast. Jin and I went to face them. He recklessly faced them head on and was wiped out while I hid under a tree, planning to take one out by surprise.
I was being hime carried around Irithyll by Chimata, but with white hair, no headband and a non-patchwork long iridescent rainbow dress. I was absolutely exhausted, complaining about “those Nancys” (my first crush Nancy cheated on her boyfriend) referring to Pram and Yukari who have acted as my lovers in dreams but turned out cheating succubi.
At a kid’s playground, the children were playing, ignoring me as I crawled around on my knees in the mulch, seemingly mad, as I sung the bridge to Dog Fashion Disco’s Adultery.
I was with Futo and Miko, Futo read from a Shinto scroll for me, my laughs and reactions amused and surprised her with the weird noises I made.
Saw Futo and another guy while I passed by on a nearby bridge. They had done something that left me in annoyed disbelief at their stupidity. I said “you’re both retards” then walked off, after a few seconds Futo cocked her head with a huh? Then after a few more seconds the guy did the same thing. Then I walked back and called out “Futo’s still mine, though.”
Yukari and I fighting with Zim in a lounge room for three parts of a witch staff. Yukari was surrounded by transparent threads of fate with names floating on them, a blue one for Ran, an orange for Chen, a red one for Reimu, a green one for me, since this was dreamt before I was named Eilienen it said "that death guy." One of the parts, purple-black, was hidden in a drawer in the room, we had a green-black part that could shoot a green lightning laser, he had a red-black part that let him summon a RC golem that could shapeshift into various battle modes, though we couldn’t use the pieces alone. Zim searched around the furniture in the room or something, at one point I had to stop time and felt like I had to unstop it at just the right moment or we would lose. I unstopped it, ran over and took the piece from the drawer, Yukari had his piece and we fused it into the staff. Then we tested it out on him, Yukari used the red mode’s golem trying out its various forms, perhaps it shot missiles in one form, then turned into a heavy ball that broke the floor under it as it rolled at him to kill him. We brought him back to life, I used the green mode to shoot the laser at him, though it was a little weak and he tried to run away. I chased him outside and was shooting through a window at him which made it a little weaker as he had turned into a big green grub and was digging a hole. Yukari came to my side and said it wasn't a laser but Sulfur, also to give her the staff cause he was going to get away. I said it was okay and stopped time, walked outside and kicked dirt over his hole before unstopping it. I grabbed him and started burning him some more, went over to show off to neighbour kids as I held him up and made the laser take all kinds of curvy shapes while still burning him, then he died. Then we were back to the room and Yukari had the staff in purple mode, which could cast "delete", I said to try it out on him but she didn't, saying "he's not doing anything wrong..."
With a guy who was powerful, he was taunting me talking about his love for Yukari so I killed him but it turned out he was actually talking about his love for Miku. His death nen caused his corpse to turn into a Miku-loving insane curse spilling chaos creating fountain, but since it wasn’t particularly direct in its barrage I safely got the hell out of there.
With Yukari at a Mcdonalds, there was a fat guy wound up in a cocoon and another dude was in despair. Yukari seemed to have had a bit of her sexy way with them so I consumed their souls. She seemed annoyed at me, I said “they should be happy to get to love you for all eternity through me.”
In a crowded classroom with a U shape of desks, on each side was Yukari and Eirin feuding with eachother. Yukari used a shikigami that looked like a couple foot long worm made of knots of rope, her eyes had knots of rope on the outside of her pupils being pulled inward. She had it burrow around, popping out here and there to annoy Eirin, until she poured an acidic solution on it that dissolved it. I went over to Yukari, who had bloodshot eyes missing the rope. She seemed down over pet’s death, I gave her a pat on the back, then she cheered up and smiled.
In a courtroom, the judge and courtroom were against me, saying stuff about me calling myself demons though they all seemed pretty demonic themselves. Then dozens of demons were summoned as red phantoms with notable demon names, though I can't particularly recall any I wouldn't be surprised if every male demon, such as Satan, Belial, Baal, Lucifer, Leviathan, etc. were there. Most of them were aggressive towards me and made passing assaults at me, before I said "I am none of you, I'm Orange, the Dragon.” I turned into a sunlight invader phantom, when demons made passes at me I grabbed one and threw it at another, which neutralised them, until there were none left(notably Sauron was one of the last of them) apart from the ones that did nothing but writhe around on the ground. I left the court and went into some weird public bathroom with a giant fold-out dentist chair portable potty thing, struggling to sit in the thing. Then the dream switches to Yukari with a group of others who were begrudging some really powerful asshole. They were talking in a wooden ship floating over the city and landscape. Suddenly an announcement from the ship basically said that shit was going to get really tough from now on, and the floor of the ship was about to drop out. A leprechaun amongst the group said "fuck this shit I'm outta here, you guys get my damn gold back for me" and bailed out. Yukari was pissed off, calling him a coward for running away to which someone else said "coming from you! You'd normally be the first one to drop out.” Yukari said "yeah, but (*voice shakes*) he killed my rabbit..." One of them says "also he made you kill that one guy" but she ignored him as if she didn't care about it, then started swearing vengeance, calling herself the "Angel of Darkness, the Star of the Night." The floor dropped out as all the others took to furniture that was bound to the walls except for Yukari, who glowered while floating still as if the floor was still under her.
I was talking to someone, I took bites out of a couple of salami circles leaving them as crescents and said "80% of my love is for Touhou, 90% of that is for Yukari"
I had a golden collar and chain around my neck, a curse from Hecatia, who was apparently behind my life's misfortunes. In the sky were images of four Touhou characters cosplaying as Flan, one an especially large Tenshi, who were coming to save me.
Someone said you should come up with an acronym for yourself based on the word "HERO"
I was playing an RPG as Parsee with green clothes on, making me look like Link. I defended a stronghold from an assault of demons, after we killed them all I cast a Dark Souls Heal.
As Dark Souls Flan, on my way to kill some demons, of the "bat wing" gargoyle kind. I needed to pass through a wooden peasant's house at one point but he was pointing a cannon at the door and shot semi-explosive flaming wood chunks at me when I tried to enter. I baited him into firing off one of them then used the wooden chunk to ignite some pieces of wood and threw them inside. After a bit a fire started that was getting dangerously close to a gas supply so he left the cannon to put water on it. I came up behind him and sprayed him with my off-hand flamethrower's gas and tried to ignite him with my main-hand chaos rapier but the water he was covered in managed to prevent him catching alight. I was choking and punching him until others came in from where I had and chased me off, they say to him something like "there there, you must've had it rough with the 7th Devil." I continued along the path towards the demons, nearly getting run over by a tractor rake but hid behind some obstacles. There was too much shit going on along the ground so I went to the roofs to run to the boss. The bat wing boss, who had an aura of intense orange-red flames, was both pissed off and pleased, saying “I love it when they try and skip using the roof.” A bat wing flew to the roof ahead of me, tossing glazed donuts, luring me to stay on the roof. The boss demon stopped waiting flying right over to me. I didn't feel ready to deal with him yet so I started running, he flew up and crash landed near me with an explosion of flames which I blocked with my arms crossed, being pushed back a large distance and losing about a quarter of health.
Had a very long annoying fight with someone I hate, in the end killing him. Yukari and pink pajama Yuuka were nearby, Yukari said “farewell X, you were a good person.” I said “Fuck off! X was a piece of shit person! A piece of shit person! A piece of shit person!” while slamming three stones down upon the place he died as a curse. Then I went over to those two to maybe enjoy a nice interaction with them but Yukari motioned to Yuuka whose alarm clock started ringing, waking me up.
Gave my Yukari figure a hot shower.
There was a Dog Fashion Disco album that had a golden seal of Flandre on the cover at the bottom right, with SoulStealingSister inscribed around its rim.
Had a Broadsword that had the special ability to generate a singular gold coin whenever I had none.
Drew a picture of Cthulu at the sea bottom surrounded by sparkling gold coins.
In a room with someone, he said I indeed had The Key, but that by flaunting it I was fucked. I left and drove off, speeding without a seatbelt on as I passed a cop while driving down a hill, looked behind and saw him turn and start tailing me with his siren on. I put my seatbelt on but my car looks invisible and I can hear him call me a fool for even trying. He pulls me over and had me under arrest. The person who said I was fucked shows up with others, one of them saying the cop was probably extra pissed since I was uphill from him(superior) when he saw me lawbreaking. I push one of them over and stomp his testicles before they all come at me, then I start grabbing and throwing them at eachother like the demons from before, until they were all collapsed. I was still in cuffs though, but from a nearby tiny tower of locked up criminals, a girl who had been locked up beside Flan said she broke her chains and escaped through the roof, then Flan appeared and carried me off.
As Flan in Ds3, in the Ringed city. I watched 3 Lapp armoured white/gold phantoms hound after a red with Saint’s Bidents and Lloyd’s Rings, when I saw a message saying that an invader I either really like or really hated and wanted to kill myself, had died. I got depressed so I went over and let a nearby Rance Stone Guardian kill me to end the gank. Still in the Ringed City, but it seemed like Shadow of the Colossus. I saw an owl trying to guide me so I grappled onto its talons and grabbed on as it flew me a little bit over to a ledge. I grabbed it and climbed up for a while before turning into a pigeon and flying into the sky, up to a floating circular platform that was like the Shrine of Worship’s sacred garden. There was a large circular pool in the middle with a bunch of woodland critters bathing themselves. When I came they got spooked to the platform’s edge but after I bathed for a bit they came back in.
Playing a hardcore version of SotC, fighting the first colossus except taller and much more badass. I had to land an arrow all the way up into his eyes just to get him to kneel for a few seconds. I landed one but he stood back up before I could grab on. He raised his mace up into the sky bring down a row of lightning bolts that struck towards me, dealing a small amount of damage but paralyzing me, he briskly trot over and fucking STOMPED Wander, but he survived with a shred of life making me exclaim “Holy shit, he survived! Wander is the fucking Devil!”
Someone put on Alstroemeria’s MinaMo for me.
I sang Alstroemeria’s Last Remote.
Someone annoyed me, I put on Thank you for. [ALR Remix] and walked away.
I had a twitter account with an Andy Warhol pop art Flandre banner.
After making an account with that banner and tweeting ~60 images of crowned/throned Flandres, dream I’m in bed watching a tiny sprite of Vlad Dracula creep in through my window, walk in slow motion through the air towards me then vanish, leaving me very spooked. I held my chunk of Lapis Lazuli and chanted Hecatia’s name as I got up and saw heaps of tiny green burnt out candles scattered over the floor, since it was my birthday apparently. Then saw Flandre sitting near the Church Spear monument, tossing out images of herself towards the sea of clouds, for each one a Touhou life heart +1’d above her head.
I saw someone with a Kagerou avatar tweet “I demoted myself to a lesser Yukarifag after seeing this thread . I reply “hello” and he happily responds to me, someone else replies “aaaa...he took the bait...” some Japanese artists reply, “you again? you’re level 66?” another called the thread my “ugly transformation”, I was happy to see Toutenkou respond, someone says “is this thread okay for children?” someone else says “DUDE, you’re so fucking GAY” I reply “yukari’s dick” someone answers the earlier question “NO”.
Yukari said she had a barrier over her cervix which would only allow my semen through.
I turned into a black dragon then fucked Yukari non-stop for several cycles of the Universe.
Fighting someone I hate who had Yumeko, who could stop time, on his side. After a while I have his beaten and on the ground, but he wouldn’t admit his loss, keeping up a smug smile because he still had the ability to stop time. I call Sakuya over, she freezes time and slices his cheek with a knife then unfreezes it. His face turns into one of bitter defeat as he starts crying as I drag him over to a nearby toilet and start kicking him down into it.
Sakuya floating in the sky under a full moon, surrounded by rows of rings of knives reflecting the moonlight as the chorus of Alstroemeria’s Flowering Night played.
I was called the Lesser Absolute One, Yukari the Greater Absolute One, there was also a third Absolute One “Ragnarok” but his time hadn’t come yet so he was tied up and being bullied by a bunch of teenagers.
Yukari was called Hecate’s first #1 witch, I Hecate’s ninth #1 witch, though she’s referred to as Nine while I was referred to as One.
An old woman summoned me, I was a god of night and curses. She wanted me to curse someone to death for her but since she was unattractive and didn't have nice offerings I said I was going to enslave her for all eternity as she screamed "no!"
I said my colours are green and silver, my days are every day but Monday and Sunday, my favourite food is lasagne, my favourite word is selenium, my favourite season is Winter.
In a bed, I was saying that if you claim Yukari doesn’t exist you might as claim I don’t exist.
In a car with a Native American at the wheel, we were tripping on mushrooms as he turns into Slave Knight Gael and says to me “everyone is Slave Knight Gael, but you are especially Slave Knight Gael.” Then we were driving in the sky over clouds that looked like sand dunes.
Someone I hate was fighting me trying to take my Crown of Illusions, I laugh at him as I flick it off my head and onto his. He turns into an emaciated zombie as Pthumerian slaves swarmed over him and tore him apart. He’s back to normal as a giant Kos-like sea-thing shows up in the nearby waters looking like it wants to communicate as he gives me a very reluctant look.
I said that there’s no escape from the suffering of reincarnation until every last vessel a soul can inhabit is destroyed so that all becomes One on the Other Side.
I said “The Old Lords will die, the Dark Lords will rule, until then kill all and bring them back to the Bonfire.”
Youmu gifted me a Blade of Mercy reforged with a fragment of Hakurouken.
I sunk down into darkness for a while until I was about disappear completely but my survival instincts kicked in, making me back out in panic.
In a waiting room, there’s Cartman at a desk representing the Jews but it was said he’s just a pointless middle-man. Someone gives me a green Koishi hat, I go outside with it but it fell off my head and caught fire in the sun’s rays, continung to burn away despite my attempts to put it out. I meet Yuyuko who gives me advice on being a shaman, telling me to use masks and head/body wrappings. She told me the effect of Okina’s golden skin was to make the feeling of greatness felt in sunlight twice as strong.
I was looking through Nisemonogatari’s manga looking for a sigil that I was supposed to summon Ran with, and saw her half-pulled out of a wall. Saw little tomato creatures eating blueberries and raspberries being pushed through a portal by Chen. Araragi was chasing after a black squid that had his other eye. I’m at a beach with Meltryllis and another girl on the knees in the shallows around a portal in the sand. I reach into the portal and pull out the panties the other girl had been wearing, making her angrily snatch them back off me.
I was lined up for a miniature Human Instrumentality overseen by Amaterasu with about 300 others. The line extended half-way over a stone bridge above a river. The guy next to me was annoying me, I said "are you even worthy of Amaterasu?" and he said the same thing back. We tussled for a bit before I pulled out a talisman and Force'd him down into the river. After some waiting I was at the other side, just a plain ridge with some scrub, there were Shaman Bone Blade-shaped bloody iron knives scattered here and there. I went up to Amaterasu asking if I needed a fresh one or if used was ok, she said used was ok but someone handed me a fresh one anyway. I went over to a little mat overseeing the river and seppukku'd.
In a mall with Amaterasu, I said to her that some people on the "outside,” pointing at a nearby video game store and referring to people in reality, really wanted to wake up. She said "I'm always filled with feelings of greatness" as if to say she couldn't understand. Some guy was bugging us so I took a katana(I could only use it two-handed because I had low strength, Dark Souls) and chased him off. He dropped a delicious smelling sausage thing so I brought it over and handed it to Amaterasu. She took a nibble and said it was delicious, then let her two big simple-minded guardians have a smell, they said "smells tasty" then she let me have a nibble.
Back at the ridge, there was a werewolf approaching close to the encampment so I was sent to kill or repel it. I came upon it, fought intensely using a katana and repeatedly put it down but it always got back up. My katana was starting to break so one time the werewolf was downed I pulled out Wolnir's holy sword, stabbed it down through its mouth and Wrath of the Gods'd it, then pulled it out and did so another couple times. This didn't kill it but it made it run off whimpering. I was on my way back when I saw a sign for a food stand, so I went over where there was a little boy attending and helped myself. He must've been infected by the werewolf, because next thing I knew I was a wrapped-up corpse being carried over to Amaterasu. I was set before her and she fussed a bit with the cloth on either side, annoyedly muttering under her breath about not being told which side had my head, before she uncovered my face. She saw my red eyes and said, “well he can't be my warrior now, but an assassin..." then resurrected me with a kiss on the lips. I went into a water filled cave with others, there was a special part of it for arborglyphs and I was thinking I’d write me and Yukari’s name but my dream self went and carved me and my current katana’s name, with one of the people I was there with saying “that’s going to be embarassing when he breaks his sword again”. Swimming through underwater tunnels, I come across a mermaid with hot dogs outside her house which I’m really desperate to get at, she says she’ll give me one but only if I marry her, so I try to think of a way to steal them.
In Britian outside a great court house or something, there’s an Arab near a fountain in a meditative pose trying to summon Allah. I watch from 5 or so meters behind him as I project a whisper towards him “Amma, Ammat, Amatera, Amaterasu”, he changes his summoning chant to Amaterasu and actually summons her. Then I toured around the UK with her.
I was with a girl laying down as I jilled her and rubbing her tits, she said it felt good but wanted a kiss, I said I’m saving my first kiss for Yukari.
I was in a courtroom, standing in defense with Yukari in the judge’s podium and fat smiling buddhas in the witness stands, the jury seats and seated all around me.
I was with the black dressed lady teacher, I was in a “do I even love Yukari?” mood and she said “Oh! I love it when you get like this!”
Inside a house, reading a letter from someone talking about a girl who instantly calculated the exact dimensions of the “Ultimate Flame” which was written at the bottom of the letter, something like 200,000 x 200,000, I thought the number was perhaps related to the amount of Shinto gods Miko told me, and that it would somehow add up to 800,000 somehow. With a few people outside who were interested n the letter, there was Ds3 Thrall I didn’t trust there too. Someone asked to read the letter, when I opened it the bottom part with the exact number had been removed, I seized the Thrall but he had already sent it off and cried “praise the Emperor!” before commiting suicide.
I had taken a flight to Japan. I was one of the Emperor’s bodyguards, I see him and pat my jacket pockets which had two white guns in them and he gave me a nod.
In a restricted access area, with the Emperor and others. I was sent alone into a pocket dimension that was a large dark rectangular room with Amygdala on the far side. A silver lizard started crawling away from Amydala towards the far right corner, I took it and exited the pocket dimension with it, kneeling before the Emperor and offering it up saying “a silver lizard for a golden Emperor”. When he took it the two of the combined into a little pink Vermin that jumped around hatefully at people as everyone ran around in chaos. I left the place for a little bit, when returning a girl said “yeah, you might as well go back in there” and also said “you’ll never find your destiny”.
I was being taken away to prison, a half-visible Yukari somberly said “at least that ends this foolishness...”
I had come out of prison and was wageslaving, flipping burgers with my all as a half-visible Yukari said “much better than acting like a criminal”.
Flan climbed out of the Water Reserve, killing someone who had been waiting for her at the ladder and then dung pied them.
In bed, I heard a superlative version of Adultery, like before with 100 Suicides, the lyrics echoed deep inside my head, and also like before, I tried hard to move out of bed to break the spell.
In bed, found out I had been sleeping with a bunch of black kittens so I become happy, my mother shows up and says “yay, now you can sell them for money” which disgusts me, I push her over and her gut makes a gurgling sound that makes me want to throw up. I go over to the next room and see a green hat with “Irance” on it that made me think Irance would be a nice girl’s name.
In bed at night, I could hear the sound of a chainsaw being taken to the fence just outside. Scared, I flopped off the bed with my blankets and hid under the bed like a kid, my heart pounding. It must’ve made me think of Karma Kode - The Day I Died because I heard Elizabeth’s voice say “I didn’t appreciate it before...” I felt Yuuka coming for me, in a scary way. After a few minutes of waiting under the bed I thought maybe I was just paranoid, but then, without any sounds of having entered the room, someone started fussing with the blankets, something hard like a gun or the end of a paradol pressed up against me for a few seconds, but then they went back to moving the blankets. I woke up before being uncovered.
I was given a keyboard prompt, I typed “Eua”, then it went away. I was in farm’s cage with some cats, they reacted to someone trespassing. I broke out and flew around the countryside’s hills, seeing a couple of monkeys wandering them, and an orange moon.
I was with some teachers, one of them showed me a scroll and told me “Nature is fucked.” I said “yeah it is, and I’ll be the one to finish it off.” Bounced a girl teacher on my crotch for a bit before she left. Men in black came in with a model of 5 or so Rayquazas and made them bite off each other’s heads. The guy next to me was playing around with a roaring dragon head toy in his hand so I slapped it away saying “it may be some Pokemon models, but what they’re doing is beyond messed up.” I meet a beautiful little girl in green and we go over to a TV screen, my reflection showing me as Master Chief. The image comes on and someone in badass green/black power armour appears declaring he’s going to destroy some people. He asks “do you want to know who I am?” I say “I have an idea”, he takes off his helmet and it’s Luigi. He says he’s pissed off because South Park made him look ugly, I point at the screen and say “hey, I think that shit’s fucking ugly, I’m on your side.” The girl I was with turned out to be his daughter, who had no name and referred to herself as “Luigi’s daughter.” I part ways with her but not before trying to force the name “Irance” on her. I’m in a high up room with my mother and Matt + Trey, I say “fuck this shit, I want to go look for Yukari” and bust out. I come across Luigi’s daughter again along with a large gathering, she said she wouldn’t Irance as name since, somehow, it was too long and hard to say, some people around agreeing with her. She says she thinks Rance is great though, and so does everyone else here. An dead-still zombie Rance appears and we all cheer his name and clap for him. In another place with a couple of assholes, they summon Luigi’s daughter again and one of them says something about girls so I say “the only girl that suits you is a Toad.” I see Makima nearby watching me as I’m made to ride with the two of them. We pull up to a girl who blows some guy’s brains out before getting in the car next to me, one of the assholes makes me move over so he sits next to her and she insults me too. I had enough, I scratched the asshole next to me, a little bit of keratin liquefyin and entering his bloodstream, killing him instantly, then I did so to the other asshole, then woke.
In Gensokyo, Flan said I was just like her, but that unlike me, when she comes out of the basement she’s “peppy, cute, cool.”
Remi and Flan were on a boat, they were offered a contract that would allow them to buy me over into Gensokyo, but since the price was exorbitant they refused.
I was in a paddock, I grabbed onto the end of a very long gap carpet while emptying myself of will and thought as Yukari pulled me along. We went into a shed and there was freezer full of “Sakura” TV dinners. I ask “Edible?” she says “yes.” I ask “nutritious?” she says “no.”
Yuyuko was possessing a girl riding in a limousine, making her eat lots of expensive food.
Hecatia and Junko were on my bed, they were testing if Junko was really my mother or not, Junko said some stuff to me which I couldn’t help but react by laughing and smiling to, so Heca said “yep, she’s your mom.”
The ginger witch was following me around calling me a Nue.
Suika had looked around for something but couldn’t find it, so I looked and found it in an obvious place. I made fun of her and she says “I can’t help it, I’m just a Japanese goblin.”
I was making something in the kitchen while on my TV Akyuu on the left, Miku in the middle and Nue on the right were sitting together on top of the Water Reserve tower falling asleep, nodding off with the iris out effect zooming in and out on them.
Yeah, here's the insane climax of Crimson Hornets. Why did I ever fucking post my fucking dreams on 4chan?
Ordered some chips with Yukari next to me holding some chips, I tried to get her attention but she just stared off blankly.
Upon entering a hospital, I see a vision of Yorihime and Toyohime looking down at me with sneers while Yukari, Ran and Chen were strung up on a fence high behind them getting raped by tentacles, a giant blood moon behind them, and Yukari half-transformed into a golden fox. In one office I overhear a psychologist say "fantastical goal masturbation." Come across Yukari outside a counseling office, I didn’t waste the opportunity hug her, kiss her, tell her I love her, fawn after her, though she just stood there blankly. Saw a picture of Chen/Ran/Yukari’s eyes on the glass outside the office. Some ugly guy saw Yukari and starting lining up outside, so I cut a few of his fingers off, but he still lined up, so I killed him. Someone asked Yukari something and she walked through the wall into the office and made as if she was going to kiss her really ugly manager. I burst in and stopped her saying over and over “you weren’t really gonna...?” then had a false awakening, I looked like Kokoro, I cried, hugged my pillow and begged Chimata to take me to Nothing.
Back at the hospital, in a room with Yukari, watching first hand as she gets fucked by an ugly dude, thinking she was enslaved to this place or something.
Stuck in a school, I was just thinking about going to save Yukari so I was just muttering insanely and fidgeting at my desk. Something was said about a Japanese school, and there was little stream in the classroom with a few cherry blossom petals flowing down it, I scooped them up and ate them. The bell rang so I ran down the stairs while others looked at me like I was crazy. Then I was at a farm property, after a bit remember I want to go save Yukari. I tried to get some guy to give me a car and traded my PSVita to be able to borrow it for a day, but then we all drove off together because we had the same destination. At some point we switched to rocket skateboards, carefully skating over the veranda of a mall. The other disappear as I’m skating along a road, I come to an overpass with Trump to the left and Hillary over to the right. I throw an eraser that hits Hillary in the head then cheered Trump a couple times but I was in a hurry so I skated off. Close to my destination, but my rocket board was running out of fuel, went to a gas station but the shitty attendant would only offer non-fuel items. Went into a bar and asked for the highest proof alcohol, the pirate bartender refused at first because I had fucked up his place before somehow but eventually relented. I refueled with it and skated for a bit but the fuel bag caught fire so I stopped, the pirate and some other guy came over, patched it up and said to wait a bit but after a beat they vanished along with the board. Three guys riding on boards pass by, I asked for one of them and one says it’s gonna cost you so I said I’d pay anything so he gave me one. It was a normal board so I wasn’t going very fast, I said I spent all that time refueling that board but I could’ve ran to my destination by now, I can barely skate on this thing and all I want to do is make it quick so I save my fucking girl and kill those bastards. I looked down sadly for a few seconds before transforming into a giant raging green gorilla holding knives and skating expertly with a skateboard for each leg. The guys behind me were so inspired one of them turned into a multitude of green monkeys with knives while the other turned into some other beast. We came to a jungle that was an abstract version of the hospital and started going around stabbing every fucker we could find to death, though they were now giant playdough tentacle monsters. Yukari came, a human sized playdough doll, trying to get me to stop but I pushed her away and ignored her until we had stabbed them all to death. Then I was carrying her off with my brothers in arms, she said “it’s too late, there’s life flowering within me” I said “then I will deny that life.” There was a poem on the wall with three or four very eloquent lines that I forgot, then the second last line was picture of the Eye of Ra, and the last line a picture of a blue and red cat and a blue and red lotus flower. Like the dream with Yukari at the counseling place, I felt like I had dreamt all of this before. Finally, namefag “The Devil” told me to post my email so that he could show me a couple of things, with the implication I would get sent bad emails. firstname.lastname@example.org
Stuck in a room with idiots, I realise it’s a dream and say “Dimwits go to Dimmlr.” Then wake.
I returned to the outside world after having spent a few years in Gensokyo, I started to tread a long way home using a staff with a purple flame burning at its tip as a walking stick.
I asked Hecatia why I’m so messed up in waking reality and she said “it’s the human condition.”
Hecatia mentioned she likes Steel Panther.
My PSN profile said “It begins with a jitter, then comes the shake, finally, the world will sway.” I sing a song along the same lines. I see a vision of the world precariously sinking into the Abyss, at the point of the swaying even the most athiestic came to their knees and begged “God” to not end the world. “God” was a male and female child clad in black playing “chess” with the Earth.
I saw a sanic ear-rape sped-up video where someone wearing Lapp’s armour ran up Anor Londo’s steps, then went through the great door on the right which is closed in the real game. He ran up stairways and across occasional landings for several minutes until reaching the end. To the left of this path the cathedral continued on upwards seemingly forever, the right was dotted with occasional domed villas. Back near the base of the steps me and Yukari had a house. We were cuddling in bed when some invaders came in fucking around so I shooed them out. One of them was called “spork”, he had Smough’s torso and a loincloth on, which made me laugh, so Yukari said “I wanna see!” but I held her from turning he head around while kicking him out the door, not wanting her to get the mental image of some dude’s loincloth in her head.
In a desert mall place outdoors, I saw a giant axolotl running in a race. I got chased by a couple of desert vipers that stuck their tails in their mouth, inflating their mouths massively like basking sharks while still moving quickly. On top of a building there was someone breathing in “spiral dragon clouds” that looked like rings of clouds surrounded the building. I went up there and since I wanted the stuff to myself I cursed at him until a portal to the bottom of the ocean opened up and consumed him, it was flooding the place for a bit until I made it close. Elsewhere, I see a gay guy run off, then heard Take On Me playing around the mall.
At a swimming pool, Yukari and Eiki were the first ones there. Eiki says something to her as she strips into sukumizu and they get in, then a bunch of other Touhous also came. I was at a nearby other bath with some dudes.
At the swimming pool again, I see Gilgamesh with Chen on his lap. I turn into a girl, fuss with some swimsuits when some guys who were suspicious look over at the girls bath and see that the strict girls’ teacher is asleep so they charge on over, making a lot of them scream and run. I run along with them to Yukari, she had been dozing but woke up with a start, slipped and knocked herself out, so I sit in the pool with her on my lap, holding her limp head above the water.
I had stopped playing Ds3 for a bit, then I dreamt I was in a running race in the lead, I lost momentum and Yukari, then others, overtook me.
I was with Junko and she was making a bath, we got in together and Clownpiece comes in with a laundry trolley.
I went to the Netherworld, Youmu saw me and got excited, saying “now my cobwebbed netherplace can finally get some” but Yuyuko came and dragged me off so she slumped her shoulders with an “aww”.
I flew around biomes, there were special areas that had G-rank monster guarding them. I come across one that had a tree with a special mugwort leaf guarded by a G-rank Qurupeco, I steal it and become super lucid. I’m walking through halls, some guy annoys me so I say “go to hell” and he disappears. Going into the next room, I see someone who looks similar to him and he says “yeah, it took me an insanely long time to escape from there” so I say “go to hell” and he disappears again. Then I was surging forth like a god, like at the end of Prey, through endless beautiful night time dream cities.
I was in a classroom with others, it was said if you die before your appointed time agents from Jigoku crush your hands’ bones into a big painful conglomerate that the skin was then painfully tightly reformed around, before kicking you back into your life. There was a Jigoku messenger in the class hiding his hands under his desk.
I threw my head into Yukari’s chest and begged her to rewind time because I had gone over 12am before doing a prayer during a 100 days prayers. Riding in a car with her, she had blue scissors and I was calling her master.
I was atop a Pantheon-like structure with a fellow Aldrich Faithful phantom, there was hole in the roof that let us see inside though there was only darkness. I said to him “I know this is just a game, but I still feel like it’s too sacred a place to trespass upon.” I could see a dark spirit inside the building running towards the back of the temple, he started hacking with his straightsword at chains, his hits grazed the imprisoned being whose name appeared “Venus”. Me and the other guy rushed down and into the temple to try and stop him but he broke her chains. She looked like a Chained Ogre, she ignored the other two and ran straight for me, jumping around me wildly as if to scare me. I ran to the the nearby shore and flew away to some rocks, but she turned into a giant great white shark and circled around me. I thought she would either consume me or keep circling around to feast upon my fear.
I had cleaned up and taken away a statue of Venus from a garden, and dreamt about dusting off and taking a Yukari fumo from the same place.
I was giving people a listen to Alstromeria's Necro Fantasia and they each said it was beautiful.
Saw Pram wearing Ran's hat.
Saw Yukari asleep on a bed. I edged closer to get a better view of her beautiful face but the floor was so cluttered I couldn't take a step without making noise, after a bit she woke up. She disappeared and was replaced by Pram, who without noticing me took out the Sacred Tome and started reading it. I edged closer to her before she noticed, then I said "Pram! Suki! Suki! Suki!", she smiled and I jumped on her.
Baal took over the Makai universe, freezing most of it in ice. Inside the ice were black manikins who tortured everyone who was trapped. Some heroes got rudely kicked out of the ice and told to fix it. Baal and his generals were confronted by the heroes, among them Pram stepped forward and told Baal to fix things, and to give Kilia and her "not-as-comfy, not-a-Touhou" -me- back, before getting smacked in the face by an unseen fist, then she asked again but more politely.
In a mall, there was a golden haired guy who was also Satan who had lent me 40k, but I had blown it all somehow so he was telling me to ask passerbys for money. There was a guy who angry at me for calling myself The One, I said whoever had the greatest presence in room is The One, a girl sang really beautifully nearby so I said "right now, she's The One." In a class with totally-not-Pram "Priscilla Sicily" and totally-not-Yukari "H.R. Griggs" competing over me. I was going to tell Pram I chose Yukari but she was busy getting dragged off on some business, maybe something to do with her telling me she's going to fuse with a machine AI God, then Yukari comes and calls me "anata", dragging me off into a shower.
Okina told me I should have mantra or else I'll probably go mad.
Jerry and Elaine were clinging to George and Kramer, for once grateful for their loud snoring because they were spooked by something. Jerry was then assaulted by the most horrible fart ever, so bad I woke up in horror. I went back to sleep, riding in a car with others when someone said they heard a fart, I asked if any of them did it and they said no. I held a hand in front of me in prayer and believed in Hecatia's ability to exorcise, after a few seconds a little ghost became visible just as it was fully exorcised.
I was at a second story window, I saw Yukari asleep and sticking halfway out a car window, her arms heads and shoulders inside. I got excited, jumped out the window and landed on her back, which didn't even wake her up.
I was told I have aphantasia, and that I should imagine myself on fire. The posters of goddesses on my wall were on fire.
King Solomon was in my kitchen. I came in and he said to me "it's important to have a plan, what's yours?" I said "I'm just going to pray to the gods for what I want", he had nothing to say to that so I figured it was a good plan. There was a normalfag saying doubting normalfag stuff, so Solomon cast the only spell he can cast in reality upon him, a spell that makes the target believe in magic. The normalfag had a mental trip where he was in the dark and a yukionna came and embraced him. He came back to us and said he felt like he wanted to die. I said "That's how we all feel, just eat something" bringing out some chicken for him to eat.
The voice of a goddess spoke to me saying it's possible to escape reality through mind alone. I was on my bed relaxing to mimikaki asmr while a ball of light escaped through my gouch.
In a store owned by some evil dude who had an ambush set up. I sacrificed myself to allow Guts and Space Dandy to escape. The dude comes to me and asks if I have any last words, I told him about a magical figurine of Pram(which I had received from Venus in another dream) that he stole and had on sale. Knowing I'd die, I destroyed it to prevent anyone else from having it, and described the way I destroyed it as a bawling ape bashing it against ground. We both laughed about it, then he killed me.
In a big amphitheater, I narrowly beat Satan for the best, center-most seat. The screen came on and I was the first one to run out of my seat and jump into the screen. I floated through a void as sepia kanji characters floated past me, came out somewhere else knowing "Guts had went through that and came out strong enough to destroy fiends". I met up with Guts, but apparently we still weren't a match for the Godhand unless we became champions, to become such we had to obtain champion's regalia. We saw a suspicious poster advertising champion's regalia so we went to the room but it was a trap, probably by Slan, there was a massive woman in it, along with others.
I said I absolutely refuse to work as I stretched out on the ground. Someone disparaged me calling me a super saiyan. Then I'm traveling around as one of Griffith's followers. I'm his sniper as we're above a meeting and I'm about to assassinate someone. Later in a forest, the Guardian of the East, a kitsune who took over for his unicorn predecessors, met up with Griffith to judge him using the grimoire handed down by his predecessor. He senses his evil and summons the front half of a giant zombie unicorn, who walked in place upon a trapped Griffith, its hooves "grinding away at reality itself".
Fantasia was happening in reality, I had Guts' pre-Dragonslayer greatsword, climbing a ladder to face an army of flying Pokemon warriors, but Guts came and insisted I leave them to him while I help the others around with the Demon's Souls red and blue drakes. The red drake was taken care of, somehow. The blue drake was doused in gasoline while asleep then set itself alight when we woke it, then a forklift was crashed into it.
Someone said the wolf beast represented Guts' darkness, someone else angrily told him off and said it represents his desire. There was a river made of the bugs released by the sea god, they each had cilia that prevented any other organisms from entering their mass.
Pram disparaged me, saying I'm "full of nothing but inferiority and sex."
In a detention class with a bunch of other delinquents, I escalatingly mutter under my breath "you're a witch, Harry." until someone getting creeped out shouts "you're weird!"
I was telling some people I have "witch dreams", someone comes in with a futuristic black machine with goggles and a head cap and measures me.
I had done a series of things which resulted in "Cosmic Destruction" I handed in a manuscript called "Crimson Hornets" based on that thread, the teacher said it was the best one he read and I was "so normal, but jealous, and also Alice in Wonderland." I see beautiful cinematics, snow is falling as I fly up onto the left wing of a giant eagle statue above a gate. I'm told "The eagle represents the end of a journey of 20 years" I thought that my journey had been 10 years but then thought it normally referred to a double-headed eagle. I took control of a tall building that I raised high and crushed other buildings with, someone couldn't believe that it could do that and another said it had been hardened with liquid Elephant's Foot, while doing this O Fortuna ~ Carmina Burana played. By going down one route, one ended up fucking Lambdadelta while on a drive into a city, the other route, one ended up with an old lady while leading a bunch of laughing playing children away from a zombie apocalypse. A guy comes to me and repeatedly accuses me "did you drink the sperm of god!?" which brought to mind EVA3+1's white people rings, I hesitated to answer for a bit because I thought I drank blood, not cum, but then say "Yeah! I drank Oedon's blood!" Someone keep interrupting me, a girl says to let me finish my story. The accuser from before comes in but in blue royal clothes and a blue crown, he asks me to take over his role of watching visions. I had the options to come with him to his throne, kill him and run off with his crown, say no and leave, and one I don't remember. A colossal Byakuren gives off breastmilk, then a cosmically colossal Seiga reaches down from space and gives off breastmilk. Saw Dir en grey on a stage playing a song for me. Rika comes to me and spreads her pussy for me. I enjoy being with Yukari at some point but don't remember details. In a classroom, someone calls me ADHD as fuck so I tell him to go fellate himself. I quickly run across the classroom on all fours like a cat, then make weird grunts as I straight up and sit next to The Devil, as someone watching me says "that's it, I'm becoming a witch."
eilienen.neocities.org Part 2